Accidental Surrogate for Alpha novel Chapter 123

Sinclair

After Ella shared her story with me, we spent a long time just kissing and cuddling, talking through our feelings and reaffirming our love. Still, Ella wasn’t entirely soothed. I could tell she was still beating herself up about her panic attack, no matter how many times I promised her it was all right.

“I just want to be able to give you what you need.” Ella moans after a while, sounding as miserable as ever.

“I don’t need to tie you up, baby.” I promise, wondering if I’ll ever be able to convince her that she’s enough for me – exactly as she is. “There are plenty of other things we can do.”

“But the idea of being tied up with you doesn’t frighten me.” Ella confesses, surprising me. “I think it was just the way you asked. Because it wasn’t about you and me, it was about what had been done to me in the past.”

I frown, unsure if she’s being completely forthright. “That’s possible.” I agree. “But the chances are that if the question was that upsetting, feeling it would be worse.”

“Not if I know it’s coming, and not if I’m handcuffed or something. The straps on a medical table are different.” Ella argues. “I’m not saying I want to try it right this second or when you’re really stressed. It would probably be better when things are calmer so that if I do panic it doesn’t ruin everything, but I think I would like to try sometime.”

“You really don’t have to, Ella.” I assure her. “Not for my sake. It should be fun for both of us, not something you have to endure.”

“I’m not just saying it for you.” Ella insists. “I don’t like thinking that they still have so much power over me. Maybe if I can get over that fear by replacing the bad memories with some good ones… I can take my power back.”

I narrow my eyes at the little minx, wondering if this is another tactic to convince me. Ella knows I’d do anything to help her, and it would certainly be clever to turn the tables on me this way. However when I look into her shining eyes, I see only sincerity. “Okay, one day when things are calmer, we can try.” I decide, running my hands over her slick skin. “But if you give me reason to think you’re just humoring me, you’re going to be in big trouble, baby.”

“I’m not!” Ella insists indignantly, sitting up and giving me a delectable view of water dripping down her bare breasts. “I don’t know if it’s my wolf coming out or what, but the more time that passes, the more I find myself craving your… well, your dominance.” She flushes bright red as the words leave her mouth, and I’m relieved to see that all the heavy emotion of the last hour is starting to fade in favor of flirtation.

“It might be your wolf.” I confirm with a grin, sliding my palms up to cup her sensitive mounds, running my thumbs over the tight buds at their center. Ella shivers and arches into my hands, delightfully sensitive amidst her raging hormones. “Or maybe you’ve always been a secret sex fiend, and you just needed time to tap into that part of yourself.”

Ella blinks, dropping her gaze for a moment before looking back up at me in surprise, as if she’s just realized something. “Do you remember when we first found each other, and I was confused because I felt like a different person with you? You said I was becoming the person I was always meant to be, and it just hadn’t been safe for me to come out of my shell before.”

“Mmm,” I rumble fondly, needing no help to recall our food fight. “As I recall you thought I was full of it.”

“But you were right.” Ella muses, sliding her arms around my neck. “My wolf recognized you even before I knew she existed.”

“Are you saying I’m right now too, and you are a sex fiend?” I joke, beyond pleased when her beautiful laugh meets my ears.

“Only for you.” Ella grins, making my inner wolf swell with pride.