Cruel World novel Chapter 60

Chap 59

(THERAPIST OFFICE)

'So Sarah did you write those pointers that I told you?' Becca holds a pen and paper and asked that with a smile

Theo saw how nervously Sarah took the paper from her bag.

Sarah was not looking him ...like she was afraid and it was disturbing for theo

Becca unfolds the paper and reads it 'hmmm, interesting....ok follow this one by one. Theo according to Sarah...she hated the moment when you use to misjudge her not to give the chance to speak to clear her. Instead of doing that you hit her....so is it true or not and please explain if it is'

Theo flinched, he clear his throat 'yes it's true and I'm terribly sorry for those moments'

Becca looked at tense Sarah 'can you highlight some of those moments please'

Sarah closed her eyes like she doesn't want to go there and Theo felt helpless...he squeezed her hand that it's ok to expose his cruelty front of their therapist

Sarah sigh 'there were many... when I met my brother after so many years of my marriage ...he ...he confronted me so bad...even he felt bad after but it still leaves me in a bad mess but most painful were when he locked me in the basement room for days, with limited food.... I almost died (Sarah shiver with the thought) and when we went to Miami he beat me so bad that I was in a coma for days and I can't even speak for weeks' Sarah said with a painful deep voice

Theo grab his head ...he remember all...he remembers how bad he was...how he almost lost her ...he again feels hate and disgust for himself

Becca looked intently at Theo 'theo what you want to say on this'

Theo look so trouble and guilty 'I feel fucking guilty and wanted to kill myself the things I did with her.....she is right... I did all of these things....those time give me a sense of power and satisfaction but now I feel like shit....(he then looked at Sarah) I'm sorry baby...so so sorry...i did all this because (he looks so regretful and in shame) because Sarah was Simon sister..and it was a constant reminder for me that because of them I lost Tina, which i know I was wrong on that....so not giving Sarah chance to speak was my way to tell her that your brother didn't give a chance to my sister than why should I'

Sarah eye filled with tears and she looks away at how this thinking of Theo made her life so difficult

Theo continue 'But whenever I do such things especially when you were in the basement room starving and when I slapped you for meeting your brother was all wrong and blaming you for giving interview behind my back in Miami and with out listening to you I did (he was shameful to even say that aloud)....so wrong that it made me doubt myself more and disgusted at that time and I'm so sorry' Theo cant meet anyone eyes after disclosing this

Becca notes something on her pad 'ok...this was very important to accept your mistakes and you did great theo. I won't say that it justifies all but it clear some confusion isn't it Sarah?'

Sarah holds the water cup tightly and nodes 'some how....but listening it made me hurt more...that's why I don't want to come here....but you force me 'she accused theo

Theo pinched his nose and softly and tiredly reply 'im sorry you are hurt but you know it was important for you'