Her Volkovs #Book 4 novel Chapter 44

Belle's POV

Nikolai's arm held me tight in place as he guides my chin to look him in the eyes. He knows that this is my weakness. He very well knows that he is my weakness.

"Baby, please." He begged.

I tried to look down but he held my chin once again. Truth is, I do not want to continue looking at him because I can actually see and feel his pain. The kind of pain that the eyes can never hide.

This man in front of me is not the Nikolai that I have always known. This is not the Volkov who always has everything under control.

"You promised you'd grow old with me. You said the three of us, forever and ever. Why are you giving up on us?"

It's as if he is truly bewildered as to why I am giving up on our relationship. It's like he doesn't understand how he and his brother broke my heart by using me as someone akin to their dead lover.

"What am I going to be fighting for then Nikolai? Our relationship was a lie. There is no reason for us to continue. There is no forever and ever. You do not love me. Your brother did not love me."

"You don't get to tell me that I do not love you. I'm the only one who gets to decide that. Believe me, you are wrong! You are the only one that I'm in love with. Whatever it is that you are thinking is wrong! Baby, did you open the letter I sent you? Did you read what's in it?"

This time, I forced myself to look away. I don't see how the letter will change the fact that they see Yelena in me. The fact that they forgot my birthday because of her.

"Ara, do you want to go?" Said Devon who just arrived in the lounge. He was the one sent by my father to arrange our return to the Palawian Embassy.

Nikolai darted a look at my cousin but Devon could not care less. He doesn't care that we are practically surrounded by Nikolai's men and that he is going against the Mafia Boss himself.

"My wife and I are talking." Said Nikolai as he holds my wrist firmly after he caught me attempting to pull away from him.

My cousin was about to step forward to take me but then Boris and Dimitri were already by his side. Before anything could happen I took the attention of the Mafia Boss. "What do you want Nikolai?"

"I want you to come home with me. Alexei is in the mansion. He's still unconscious but we both know whose face he wants to see when he wakes up."

"Ara." Said my cousin with a hint of warning in his voice.

"I will come with you to the mansion." I said, ignoring Devon. Nikolai then signals his men to prepare to leave but I wasn't finished yet.

"I will come with you to the mansion for one night, just so I can see Alexei but you will stay away from me."

"Okay." He was quick to answer.

"And you will sign the divorce papers. You will not contest every single provision and I get full custody of the children. You will have visiting rights anytime you want."

Nikolai's adam's apple moved as if what I just said was too much for him to take. He wasn't able to say a word for a good ten seconds. He just looks at me, eyes glistening.

I know that I am in no position to negotiate with him at this very moment because if he wishes, he can just have me and my whole family dragged back to the mansion. Still, I am taking my chance.

"I will sign- the divorce- in one condition."

I felt like my heart skipped a beat the moment I heard his response. I know that this was against his will and yet he was able to muster the words. Nikolai Vyacheslav Volkov just agreed to divorce.

"What condition?" I asked before he could even change his mind.

"You will read the letter I sent you and the one attached to it."

The letter must be that important to him that he is willing to give up and sign the divorce paper in exchange for it to be read. "How can I be sure if you will keep your part of this deal Nikolai?"

"I am a man of my word Arabella. I do as I say. And you know that."

I know that I have struck a nerve when it came out as that I don't trust him. Truth is, I know him as a man who keeps his word. He does exactly as he says.

My father and Nikolai talked for a while before Papa and Mama were escorted back to the embassy. My father was not persuaded to stay temporarily in the mansion and so tonight they will be staying at the embassy. Amy and Devon will come with me to the mansion until our meeting with the lawyers tomorrow to finalize our divorce. I made sure everything is planned and discussed with Nikolai before I even agreed to come to the mansion with him. My only concern now is surviving the night with Alexei in dire condition and Nikolai just around.

-

The Mansion

Belle's POV

It's almost midnight and so far Nikolai kept his word that he will stay away from me. I haven't seen him since we arrived in the mansion. I'm in our room and everything is exactly where it was before I left.

Alexei is stable but he needs to wake up the soonest possible time. The longer he's unconscious, the smaller the chance that he will be better.

I try not to think of what will happen when I leave after tomorrow given that this is Alexei's condition. Part of me hates myself for thinking about my freedom knowing fully well that when I leave, Alexei's condition is still unclear. I want to take care of him but I don't know how to, if the only thing I want is to leave them.

I sat back and rested on the comfortable chair right next to Alexei's bed. I cradled my very pregnant belly as the little Volkovs are making it harder and harder for their mother to function normally each day. The doctor's appointment to know the gender of the twins is overdue. I'm thinking I should do it whilst in New York because I want to share that very special moment with both Nikolai and Alexei. As much as I want to divorce them, when it comes to the twins, they will have their fair share of happiness.

I left my phone in my bag somewhere and so I used Alexei's that is within my reach. His wallpaper is still the same picture he took back in the brownstone house, the one with the flower headpiece. I can still remember the exact cheeky smile on his face when he called me mother earth asking about the trees in the forest.

Scandalous is the mildest word to describe the contents of this man's gallery and storage. My goodness, what if someone gets a hold of his phone?

I dialed Nikolai and after two rings he answered.

"Baby."

"Hmm. How did you know it was me Nikolai?"

"My brother is passed out. You are with him. Takes no genius to deduce really." He said with the typical Volkov arrogance.

"What am I doing now?" I asked as I test my theory that he might be watching me from somewhere. I removed my bra and adjust my top to show my plunging breasts.

"Oh fuck." He mumbles. "I mean, you're calling me right now on the phone. You are asking some weird questions Arabella." He said as he clears his throat.

Hmm. Suspicious.

"How about now?" This time I reached for Alexei's hand to hold my left boob.

I heard him whisper in Russian. "What was that Nikolai?" I asked.

"Nothing baby. Again, you are asking some weird questions."

"Hmm. Okay. So about the twins." I said adjusting my top and going back to my seat.

"What about the twins?"

"Would you like to hear their heartbeats and find out their gender? You know, before- before we divorce?" I covered my mouth to suppress myself from completely breaking down. I feel bad for the twins. I feel bad that we are giving up on them. And I hate myself for being in this situation.

There's nothing but silence on the other side of the line. I wiped the tears that are flowing down my face and did not push the suggestion further. Maybe he is not ready to do it so I just let it go.

-

Nikolai downs his liquor and closes his laptop after seeing Belle in the security camera doze off. He leaves the study and went straight to the master bedroom. He removes the phone from Belle's hand and brushes off the hair from her face. He then checks on his brother and whispered to his ear, "You fucking lucky bastard."

He puts the warm blanket in place to make sure his brother is good for the night. He then carries Belle in his arms gently, taking his precious time to place her in bed. In Nikolai's mind, he does not want this night to end. He doesn't want tomorrow to come.

He covers her with their duvet resisting the unbearable urge to touch her and feel her warmth against his skin. She's right here beside him and yet she's so far away.

Nikolai can literally feel his heart hurt as he recalls how Belle is so determined to break off their marriage. How she has completely given up on him.

They have fallen apart, beyond repair. The letter is the only thing left for him to save their relationship, and even with that, he's not hopeful he can fix her heart to forgive him.

Nikolai rested his back on the headboard of the bed, staring blankly in the dead silence of the night. He looks at the table right next to him and contemplated for a while before finally giving in. He took a few pills from the compartment and downed it with vodka. Since Belle left them, the pills became Nikolai's solace. The numbness he feels as the effect hits his system became his temporary cure.

-

Scene: Yuri, Dimitri, Boris and Andrey outside of the Master Bedroom, hands in their pockets and looking at the huge door in front of them.

Dimitri: Why is it so quiet?

Andrey: It's not going to happen.

Boris: -

Yuri: (Clenches his jaw, looking at the door intently) (Turns his back and leaves impatiently.)

Andrey: (Follows his brother) Hey, what's going on?

Yuri: It's over.

Dimitri: What do you mean it's over? They're there. They are going to patch things up and everything is going to be alright tomorrow.

Yuri: It's the Boss. The Boss has given up.

-

Belle's POV

When I woke up the next day, everything looks in place and no Nikolai Vyacheslav Volkov was in sight. It was silent in the room aside from the slight beeping of some of Alexei's apparatus.

Dimitri said that his Boss left early for a meeting. I did not ask further as it's none of my business anymore. What matters is he has agreed to sign the divorce papers later.

Before anything else, I needed to arrange Alexei's care before I leave. Amy was able to recommend four private male nurses who will work in shifts to tend to him aside from the ones sent regularly by the hospital to check on him.

I held Alexei's hand tightly and kissed him all over his face as I reckon that this is going to be the last time that I'm going to see him for a very long time.

"I'm sorry Alexei. I am so sorry if it has to end like this. Please wake up soon? You can visit the twins anytime you wish. Just please wake up. Your brother needs you. And the twins need you." My heart is honestly torn between still hating him for what he and his brother did and not wanting to leave because of his condition.

"Belle, dear, may I speak with you?" Asked Matushka as she enters our room. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and my face because I do not want her to see that even in surrender, I'm still miserable.

To my utter surprise, she slowly knelt in front of me while looking down on the floor.

"Matushka."

"It was my fault."

"Please, don't do that Matushka. What's the matter?"

"Princess, I was the one who insisted to your husbands to give Yelena our last goodbye. I prepared the memorial. I was the one who arranged that room to look like Yelena's room without Nikolai and Alexei's knowledge. I placed your wedding gown in that room because I was thinking that Yely would have looked so beautiful in that dress too."

I did not know what else to say at this moment. I am so confused no words are coming out of my mouth.

"The first time we met that night when Alexei brought you to my house. I became obsessed with the thought that finally-finally I can make things right with Yelena. That you are our redemption."

I remember that night and as I recall, she indeed calls me Yelena the first time we met. And I also remember vividly how Alexei disapproved of it. Disapproved of how his mother looked at me and called me Yelena.

"Please." I pulled her carefully from the floor and helped her sit down on the chair. "Why did you think that I was your redemption? I don't understand Matushka."

"For years I refused to accept that Yelena's death was because she ended her own life. I insisted that someone out there was responsible for her death when all this time I have known the truth. I manipulated my sons to believe that she did not kill herself but someone did. I made Nikolai and Alexei find the person behind her death for years."