The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO) novel Chapter 84

I’m doing what he’s making me do, my body moving in time to his, held captive by his mouth and hands. Climbing again, only so intently I know I’m going to rip apart. I don’t know how to react. How to stop it. I don’t want to stop it … but I have to … I’m scared that it’ll overwhelm me … Marissa invading my mind, what we’re doing, doubt searing through me. It’s too much, it’s too intense, writhing under him, trying to keep control, but he grabs my wrists roughly as I try recoil, holding them down to the floor while making my senses reel back to him. He stops fucking me.

“I’ll stop, Emma … Do you want me to stop?” his tone is serious and dark, but his eyes are wary and begging me. It’s like he drags my focus back in from all the messy over thinking that is pushing in and I shake my head … I don’t want to face the after … It can’t stop. I don’t want him to stop.

“Don’t,” I pant, scared of the intensity in his look, just how overcome with lust he is and how desirable he is to me right now. He visibly relaxes and starts moving hard and fast inside me, as though he knows I may change my mind, pulling my thighs up for leverage and holding me more firmly with every thrust. His desire drowning out sense and Jake really goes for it.

Every part of him against me, his mouth on mine again and I’m lost as his tongue caresses my own. I relinquish all control. That last piece of him entwined with me, drowning out the last of the voices in my head. His kiss, my savior from myself, while he pounds me like he just can’t stop.

It sends me off the edge and I erupt so suddenly; I can’t even prepare as it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I cry out, scream his name, digging my nails into his shoulder blades while spasms explode inside and out, causing a million sensations to ignite at once. My brain spins and jerks in ecstasy … It’s devastating … It’s amazing and overwhelming all at once as my thighs clench around his waist forcefully. He thrusts hard into me once more, heightening my completion, causing another volcano eruption of stars which have me spiraling out of control, up and over the crashing waves, free falling, crying out and clutching for dear life as he holds me. Spent as soon as the shudders recede, Jake stills with me, falling on top of me, panting as much as I am so I guess he found his own climax inside of me while I was mid orgasm.

“Emma … Merda.” He breathes and groans into my neck, laying heavily over me after his own cumming. I lay sated and breathless as the world slows around me and my senses start to calm. My body is tingling all over, and I’m exhausted. Suddenly emotional and all too aware as sense loses its lust fog. The self-consciousness in me rolls over and it’s like I suddenly see what we just did which shakes me before kicking me in the gut with a rude awakening. I’m semi-naked and entwined with him on the floor of our suite. This is more than an “oh shit” moment … That’s a massive understatement. This is more of a “I’ve lost my fucking mind” moment.

I shrug out from under him, instantly mortified, cold, terrified, ashamed, unsure, and he rolls away reluctantly. Kicking his pants and underwear from around his ankles. I start to tremble as this hits me properly, and I scan his naked body in panic.

What we have done?

My face starts burning and my legs turn to Jell-O … I can’t breathe as anxiety tears my mind open, my body still basking in the aftereffects, yet also regret swooping in. I try to get away quickly, but he hauls me back to him, against his naked body and I stiffen all over.

“Emma, don’t.” He warns, with an unreadable tone.

“Don’t what?” I sound small and terrified and I hate that voice, it’s betraying the overwhelming hysteria growing up inside of me like a tornado, about to engulf my entire world.

“Don’t close that door … not after this.” He stretches out beside me on the floor, voice low and raw but I want to die with the shame at what I have just allowed him to do with me. No better than all the whores he beds.

I can’t … I can’t do this. What the hell have I done? I’ve just destroyed my relationship with Jake and my entire career in one fell swoop. I’ve just opened Pandora’s box on a whole host of chaos I can’t deal with.

My mind’s running at a hundred miles an hour. I’m seeing everything we are, and I’ve worked for, crumbling away to dust. He can do casual sex and brush stuff like this off, but me? I just completely surrendered what was left of my heart to the one man who would never want it, and I can’t go back. He’s ruined me for anyone else ever!!!

“We crossed the line, Jake … we can’t go back from this.” There are tears in my eyes, because I know this changes everything. He swears under his breath and rolls over me, leaning in while trying to bring me back to him, but I resist. His eyes searching my face, trying to gain contact. Caging me in with his muscular arms but my walls are rising.

“Emma, don’t do this … It’s sex … Don’t over think it.” His words are like a slap in the face. This is the problem right here! This was just another meaningless screw to him … Another faceless woman. But it wasn’t. It was me … Emma! And now everything is destroyed, and I’ll never go back.

“I’m not you!” I spit angrily, I shove his chest hard, the emotion bubbling up, ready to burst forth. That inner self-doubt and fear flooding through. “I can’t just have sex then shrug it off meaninglessly.”

Why did he have to say it like that? Like this is nothing. This is why I should have never let it get this far.