"i still haven't forgiven you for what you did today," noah muttered, sinking back against the pillows as he watched abel pull at the hem of his shirt, deciding to sleep shirtless as it was warmer that day.
"me?" abel raised his eyebrows in question, pushing the hair off his forehead. "what did i do?"
"excuse me? what was that in the lounge?" noah referred to abel 's little teasing act and abel just covered his mouth with the back of his hand to let out a slight giggle, walking over to noah's side of bed and climbing over the older boy.
"get off me," noah complained as abel straddled his duvet covered body, leaning forward and leaving soft kisses over noah's neck.
"oh come on," abel teased, shifting closer once noah's warm hands were gripping his hips, his lips locking on a sensitive spot and sucking the pale skin, earning a shaky breath from noah, his eyelids fluttering shut.
"d-don't leave marks i have w-work—fuck," noah groaned once abel bit down, on of his hands reaching up to twist into noah's hair, pulling at the dark locks to expose more of noah's neck, and noah tilted his head back pliantly, resting it back against the headboard, fingers gripping abel 's hips tightly as he continued his assault.
"but you're my husband, i can leave marks if i want to," abel argued, purposely trailing his lips further down, sucking a mark above noah's collarbone and noah just bit his lip, pulling abel closer, and sighing fervently.
"abel, stop," noah's fingers twisted into abel 's hair, pulling at it harshly to stop his actions, and abel just let out a soft moan, lips parting at the action. the younger boy's cheeks flushed once he realised the sound he had made, quickly getting off noah's lap and sitting next to him, covering his body with the duvet, pursing his lips in embarrassment.
"um, y-you, abel?" noah stammered. "you were into hair pulling? how did i not—what?" he spoke confused, twisting in his position to stare at abel, slight shock on his face, not because he was judging him or he found it weird but out of confusion as to why he didn't figure it out earlier.
"n-no, i don't what the hell?" abel dismissed the conversation, cheeks pink, as he shifted his body to lay down, and noah just sighed, laying down close to abel and pulling the younger boy's body against his chest.
"why are you embarrassed? it's only me," noah kissed the back of his head and abel just leaned into his grip, letting a loud breath escape his lips.
"i know," abel mumbled, cheeks still pink as noah's lips left a soft kiss over his cheek, trailing further only for a moment to leave a string of kisses across his jaw.
"i just thought maybe you found it weird? we haven't been exactly having, i mean, i'm not complaining but we aren't as sexually, i mean, i know we both have work and we don't get time but—"
"if you want to have sex at two am when you come back from work, i don't mind," noah said sarcastically, rolling his eyes, his grip loosening on abel 's waist.
"it's not about when i come back from work it's—"
"oh is it not? so you don't think your work timings have anything to do with—anyways i'm really tired so," noah sighed, retrieving his arms from around abel and shifting back to create some distance between them.
"i know my timings aren't exactly ideal but that doesn't mean we ignore each other constantly," abel argued, turning in his position to face noah, but noah was just laying on his back, blankly staring at the ceiling.
"okay," noah sighed in defeat, not wanting to start a fight, but abel wasn't having any of it. they had to talk about this sometime or the other and he was tired of them going around the problem in endless circles, never trying to find a way to end it.
"you can't just—what do you mean okay? is this it then? are you finally going to start kissing me in the morning when i wake up?" abel remarked and noah let his eyes fall shut, bringing one of his arms over his face to let abel know that he was not interested.
"you can't do this everytime noah, you just—why can't we just talk about it?" abel was embarrassed at noah's lack of interest. does he not care at all?
"let it go abel, it's fine," noah muttered ignorantly, causing abel to sit up in bed in frustration, running his fingers through his tangled hair.
"it's fine? so the fact that we don't talk properly anymore or that we have sex once or twice a month is fine? whenever i try initiating anything you just ignore me, and i want to know the reason," abel demanded, voice raising in volume as he dug his nails into his palm, brown eyes fixed agitatedly on noah's figure.
"yeah it's fine, there's no reason i'm just tired sometimes," noah doesn't offer much of an explanation, simply dismissing the conversation and rolling on his side to face away from abel.
"best friend? you mean chris? what's wrong with him? what has he done?" abel is on the verge of saying something he shouldn't and his fingers are itching against his thighs in annoyance.
"nothing abel," noah sighs. abel can just never take the hint.
"no tell me, i've seen you sulking about him a lot, yesterday you snapped because he was texting me and you didn't come out of the room when he came over. just, tell me, what is it?" abel seems to string a few pieces together but he is still so clueless and it makes noah want to rip out his own hair.
"i said it's nothing abel," noah's fingers clench into tight fists, and abel notices that, a possibility suddenly sparking in his brain.
"are you..jealous? o-of chris?" the words sound ridiculous when they leave his mouth, and more so when noah's cheeks flush in embarrassment and a lump forms in his throat.
"that's ridiculous noah," abel comments and noah can feel the lump growing fatter, almost to the point where it's impossible to swallow. of course it's ridiculous to abel, something about which noah has been insecure for months.
"i didn't say anything," noah chokes out, a deep breath leaving his lips after and abel just sighs, running a hand through his hair.
"he is just a really good friend," abel doesn't understand. it's not that noah is jealous of chris. he is afraid and insecure of the possibility that abel may like chris more than he likes noah, and the fact that abel probably is more comfortable around chris than he is with noah, makes noah want to question their entire relationship.
somehow in front of chris, everything that they have been through seems to crumble into a meaningless mess. like it doesn't matter.
and noah is not jealous, he is just afraid.
and abel just doesn't understand that.
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