Through the Screen novel Chapter 80

"should i wear my blue jersey or is it too cold for that?" adrian holds up a jacket as he stares at both his parents sitting across from each other on the dining, both their hands curled around separate cups of what looks like coffee.

"i think that's fine," noah cocks his head to the side. "what time do we have to leave?" he adds and adrian's eyes drift to the wall clock, before his eyes widen.

"i have to be there in twenty minutes! i'll just put on my shoes, can you drive me right now?" adrian looks over to noah anxiously. he doesn't want to run late into class and have multiple pair of eyes on him, their mouths silently moving to talk about the guy who is so unpunctual. he already gets a lot of shit at school, the last thing he wants is to people at his football class to talk about him too.

"yeah, of course, go get ready," noah gulps down the scalding coffee in one go and gets off his chair, pulling his jeans up his hips and carding a hand through his hair to make the slightly greasy mess to stay off his forehead.

abel watches quietly, his mouth touching the rim of his cup but not sipping as he stares at noah, his soft lips humming an unknown song and his feet carrying him down the hall to get his shoes. abel has this constant anxiety bubbling in his stomach, not even the warmth of coffee is helpful, the liquid that could calm him down once it slides down his throat is today of no use.

nothing is willing to comfort him, and he believes it's because he doesn't deserve it. from adrian's smile to noah's hugs and now the brown liquid swirling in his cup—nothing can retain the comfort back into his body. he is restless and anxious and his heart is refusing to glue the pieces together. it's constantly breaking, piece by piece, vein by vein, and his chest is physically hurting with guilt.

he knows if he's away from noah for even a second he will lose the slight grip on himself and break down in the worse way possible. he could do things that would not only hurt him but his family as well, and the thought of what he could do to himself to deal with his haywire emotions scares him.

when noah returns and sits down on the chair again, bending over to put on his shoes, abel puts the untouched cup of coffee back on the table and gulps inaudibly before opening his mouth to speak.

"noah?" his voice is croaky. he hasn't spoken a single sentence ever since he collapsed in noah's arms, and the blue eyed boy turns his head to the side to look at him.