Alpha Nox by Jane Doe novel Prologue

For as long as I lived, I would never forget that day.

It was the day the people I considered my friends—my family, failed me irreparably. The day that the life that I knew and loved was ripped out from under my feet, splintered like the deck of a mighty ship, leaving me to drown in the ferocious waves below.

This was the day I learned the sheer power of betrayal and how it can motivate a person to endure anything.

The shackles around my wrists were heavy. Cold against the burnt flesh that spanned my wrists. Just as my skin would start to heal, scabbing over in rough patches caked with dried blood, the silver would brush up against them and split them wide open. With every step I took, the chains connected to those shackles rattled, singing a terrible song of agony, death, and unrequited love.

The townspeople parted to let me through, keeping their distance only because the guards standing on either side of me forced them to. I was more than positive if they were allowed, they’d hurl stones and throw fists, shouting words just as painful as their blows.

If only they knew that had I wanted to, I could’ve broken free.

These were the people that had watched me grow up, that had stood on their front porches waving as their children and I walked to school each day. How quickly they turned on those they considered friend and family, tossing away their narrow-minded ideas of community when it suited their sadistic needs.

I’d never forgive them for this.

I held my head high because that’s what Einar (AY-NAR) women did. Turning my nose up at the crowd like I was better than them because I knew the truth.

It’s what my mother did when the rogues murdered her, uncaring that she was holding my newborn sister against her chest. Using her abilities would’ve saved them both but would also have painted a target on all our backs. One that could never be removed. It was their sacrifice that granted me life—a life I threw away for something as fickle as love.

The one solace I had to this entire situation was a double-edged blade. One poised at my throat, pressing hard enough to draw blood that only I could see. Once this was all over, I’d be with my mother and sister. I’d walk into the Moon Goddesses arms, my head held high, and tears buried beneath silent rage.

…but my father.

Titus Einar, the one man that believed me, that loved me despite the crime I committed. He’d spend the rest of his life mourning me, just like he mourned my mother and sister.

The mere thought of my father made my eyes sting with tears. They would never know the pleasure of falling, of drying against pale skin, leaving salty kisses behind.

I scanned the crowd, my neutral expression carefully composed and perfectly in place. Disappointment battered me upside the head when I failed to see his broad shoulders and long blonde hair, but I couldn’t blame him.

What person on this Goddess-forsaken earth would want to attend their only daughter’s execution?

I was led through the clamoring crowd, shoved past their hateful words that ricocheted off my skin like spitballs, and into the city court room.

Even though I’d spent my entire life in this pack, I’d never been in this building before. There was never a need to come here.

The guards flanking me bypassed the security check-in, escorting me around the metal detectors and to a series of large double doors. Seeing as I’d been locked in a cell for the past three days, there was no need to check me for weapons. Hell, the scraps of cloth they called clothing didn’t even have pockets.

I knew which room we were going to by the sound of chattering coming from within.

Part of me wanted to snort when I was escorted into the largest, grandest court room I’d ever seen. Of course, Alpha Oliver would take every opportunity to make a spectacle out of this.

Even my bastard of an Alpha, who was among the many that had watched me grow up, hadn’t believed me when I tried to explain myself.

No one had. Not even him.

The moment I entered the court room, I could feel his eyes on my face. They had a weight to them that no one else seemed to have, inciting a pressure that rippled over the skin and caused one to shudder.

Despite everything—despite every way he failed me, I could not stop myself from meeting his eyes.

Nox Griffin, my best-friend, the boy I harbored a secret love for, and the son of our illustrious Alpha.

He stared at me from the podium where he stood proudly beside his father, his eyes a bright whirlpool that sucked me in only to spit me back out. Just the sight of him cracked the mask I’d spent three days crafting.

How could you, Nox? I wanted to cry out.

Everything I did—everything—it was all for you.

He looked so much like his father, rigid and immovable with hair darker than the prison cell I’d been thrust into, an expression of malice on his face where there had once been fondness. I clung to the scraps of my mask because without them I knew I’d cry.

A gavel rang out, clashing against wood and echoing in the courtroom until every witness in attendance grew silent.

I stared at Nox unblinkingly, showing him with my eyes the horrible mistake he’d made.

I take back the love I gave you, Nox Griffin.

I take back the future I pictured for us.

I take back the mate-bond I prayed to the Goddess for.

I take it all back.

This one last time, I let myself drink him in. I traced the lines of his plump rose petal lips, ones I never had the pleasure of kissing but had often dreamt about. His shoulders, which had filled out more over the summer, along with the mop of unruly hair on his head, so thick and soft that I’d often tug at it every chance I got.

When his father began speaking, I was forced to look away.

“I, Alpha Oliver Griffin, have gathered you all here today to sentence Ms. Lilac Einar for her heinous crimes against this pack.” He addressed the crowd, sweeping his pale eyes over every one of their faces.

Murmuring rang out, rippling along the crowd that sat in rows at the back of the room and on the shoulders perched on small balconies overlooking the courtroom.

“Lilac Einar, do you confess to the murder of Beta Silas Whitlock?” Alpha Oliver asked in a steady voice that made me want to roll my eyes.

Your mate would watch Nox and I after school when my dad was busy at work. She’d make us little sandwiches and give us juice boxes, watching with starry eyes as we played. Yet now you stand here with wariness in your eyes, because now—now you finally see me for what I am.

A threat you cannot contain.

A threat no one can contain.

So many memories, so many chances for them all to just listen to me, but they never did. They saw a fraction of what I could do and let the fear of it swallow them whole, stealing away their memories and reason.