I had to hold my son on my lap in the back as the taxi driver drove us to the train station. We drove past a rundown hotel on the way to the station, and I think I may just have enough fuel to get my car there; hopefully, I did. After spending the entire night in the rain, I wanted a hot shower, wanted something warm in my belly, but most of all, I wanted the safety of four walls, even if it was only for one night.
I tell myself that one night is all I need to let it out, then I can suck it up and figure something out. I handed the taxi driver some cash from the wad my father gave me. I had no idea how much my sister snuck into the bag, but getting my keys from the baby bag, I unlocked my car and climbed in, pulling the hatchback down when I realized I no longer had a car seat.
Shit! I think knowing how long I saved for that car seat. I open the bag and empty my pockets after placing my son in his box bed. My father gave me $525. I snort. Gee, thanks, dad. I think to myself. But that would buy roughly 16 Tin’s of formula and 4 boxes of nappies, so it would keep me out of trouble for a while.
Opening the bag my sister packed for me. I found feminine products. Hair products, makeup. Some black slacks and a blouse and some black flats assuming she placed them here if I managed to get a Job Interview. I find her old touchscreen phone and a charger before finding an envelope. Opening it and pulling out all $100 bills. I feel a lump in my throat form; she gave me everything she had.
I knew she did. There was nearly eight thousand dollars in the envelope. She gave me all her savings, and I felt a tear slip down my cheek. Turning the envelope over, I see her neat handwriting. ‘You can do this. I love you.’ It was written on it, and I nodded at her words on the envelope. She was right. I could do this, I could because I had no choice. I would make it work.
Packing up some clothes and refilling the baby bag, I pack a little bit of food to eat later before changing my son. Once he is dressed with a fresh bum on. I grab my umbrella and toss my bag over my shoulder along with the baby bag before scooping up my son.
Locking my car, I then start walking, deciding to head to the rundown Hotel I saw. I wondered how I had never noticed it before, but even if it was just for one night, I could pretend I was normal. After a decent shower the other night before being tossed aside by my mate and my son’s father. I now longed for a tiny piece of normal. Some dignity, a chance to feel human even if it was for only one night.
I walked to the rundown Hotel; the rain was only light and had nearly stopped when I reached the two-story rectangular building. It had peeling paint, and the gardens were overgrown. The sign out the front hung down, and the neon lights flickered as they tried to remain on. The lines in the parking lot were faded, and the hotel numbers on the door were barely visible. Reaching the office, a woman sat on the chair out front with a cigarette between her fingers. Pushing on the door, the bell sounded, and the woman sitting smoking spoke behind me.
“I will be with you in a second just let me finish this,” she says, holding up her smoke. She stares at me, watching me, her eyes roaming over my appearance before stopping at my son in my arms.
“He’s yours?” She asks. I nod, looking down at him and tucking him closer.
“The father?” She asks, and I shake my head.
“Not your mate’s?” She asks, and I feel tears burn my eyes at her words.
“He is your mate, so why are you here?” She asks curiously, pointing to the chair beside her.
“She leans over looking at my son” she appeared to be in her fifties with dark hair cut to her shoulders. She had her nose pierced, heavy eye makeup, and a tank top and jeans.
“He has strange eyes; reminds me of someone I used to know; amber eyes are usually a family trait. Not many wolves in MountainView City with eyes like that,” she says.
“So the blood Alpha is your mate and his father,” she says, and I look at her. She smiles and nods when I say nothing.
“Powerful family, so why aren’t you with your mate?”
“He didn’t recognize me and kicked me off pack land before I could tell him about his son,” I admit.
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