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Betrothed To The Mafia Lord novel Chapter 384

Sofia’s pov

Once again, before I could begin to climb up the stairs, Luca stopped me with his hand on my wrist, stopping me from moving an inch forward.

And after that, I refused to turn back around back to stare at him, because I didn’t want him to see that this entire thing was getting to me this way.

I didn’t want him to see the tears already starting to gather in my eyes.

I didn’t want him to see how weak I was, and kinda pathetic.

But, he kept tugging me around until I gave in and turned around, eyes plastered to the ground. I didn’t see his hand come around until I felt his hand move beneath my chin really lightly to tip my face over until I was staring up at him.

I hastily tried to blink my eyes in order to hide the tears, but that was a wrong move because it only made the tears roll down my cheeks really slowly.

The shock that took over Luca’s face almost immediately was almost comical.

“Why are you crying?” He asked, voice quiet as he reached up to thumb one of the teardrops away, but that only made more tears roll out, because now he that he was acting like this with me, it was undoubtedly only because I was currently crying.

“I’m not crying.” I responded as I tried to blink the tears away, but that didn’t seem to be working like it usually does.

“Yes, you are. Please tell me you’re not crying because of what I had done.” He murmured and I felt my heart broke in my chest, wishing he’d just leave me to go cry myself to sleep or something instead of being here, recieving nothing but mixed signals.

“You once told me you didn’t like it when I lie to you. Are you asking me to lie to you right now? Because we both know the actual reason for my tears right now.” I whispered in response and didn’t miss the pure look of nothing but pain and something akin to regret on his face.

“Sofia…” He whispered, voice hoarse as he slowly cupped my face like I was something really tender and valuable. I couldn’t relented the last time he had held me like this while having this same look in his eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered after a moment and I allowed my eyes to slide close while tears slowly trickle from the side of my eyes.

There was so many thoughts currently going on in my head which was making me feel extremely overwhelmed right now.

Being in this kind of close proximity with Luca right now after wanting and craving it for weeks, was making meek overwhelmed as well.

“I’m so sorry, Sofia. I didn’t mean to make you feel this way. I didn’t mean to hurt you this much. I’m so sorry, Sofia…”

I remained silent as he kept on apologizing while thumbing my tears away with my eyes still closed because I didn’t want to look at him.

I didn’t want to stare into his face and witness so many emotions washing over his face at once which would do nothing but confuse me further than I currently feel.

After a while, I blinked my eyes open to stare up at him. A blank expression had settled over his face when my eyes had been closed, making it hard it read his face.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered once again and I slowly shook my head.

“Why are you apologizing?” I questioned in s soft voice that conveyed how genuinely confuse I was currently feeling.

“I– for hurting you unknowingly.” He responded and once again, I shook my head.

“No, that’s not the only reason and you know it. Why are you really apologizing to me right now?” I found myself asking once again, silently praying I’d get a tangible response today.

“For the issue with Lola…”

I shook my head hastily.

“You know that’s not even the main reason for me being hurt right now, right?”

I huffed out a breath before continuing. “I’m not a jealous person. I’m very practical, and I’m very sure that I might not have even felt a little hurt on returning from the dance floor to meet you talking with Lola, if you had been speaking to me and acting like you usually do around me.” I explained and then I exhaled once again.

“It’s cause of how things had been between us. That’s why I got hurt on finding you talking with her, although you leaving to go continue your conversation with her wasnt right. I don’t hate her or feel jealous of her, I still think she’s cool and light hearted. I just don’t like how you acted with her, that’s all. So, like I said before, that’s not the reason why I had been hurt. It’s just what triggered it really hard, I guess?”

I watched as Luca blinked once before slowly exhaling and then he slowly caressed my cheeks with his thumbs. The gesture felt so soft, it melted into my bones.

“I’m still sorry.” Luca whispered and I scowled st him. “Stop apologizing since you don’t even know why you’re doing so.”

He made to speak again but I shook my head, taking a step away from him which made his hands fall off my face. “It’s okay. Nothing’s wrong. I just feel overwhelmed, that’s all.”

It seems like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how to word them, but I didn’t dwell on that much, because it was definitely going to be of no use.

It’s insane and almost laughable thzt he still keeps insisting to not know how he actually hurt me.

I didn’t get a single hug from him, and he thinks that was okay?

I contemplated about telling him about how he barely showed me any encouragement today and how I felt like crap throughout the whole of today, and also how I didn’t feel as happy and lightheaded as I was supposed to be at the hall today, but decided against it after a few moments.

I let out a small sigh after a few moments.

I didn't even have the emotional strength to do that– to start telling him all of that, which are things that he was supposed to automatically know, because he does them before of his own free will.

He made those things become my normality, and now that things were different, everything now seem so wrong and incorrect.

But, I refrained from saying all of that to him, because I didn't want to sound entitled to his attention and affection.

That night, I cries herself to sleep, all alone in the bedroom, feeling cold to my bones.

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