Big Bad Wolfie novel Chapter 19

••• Still Jason's POV •••

I watched the blood flow smoothly down the tube and into my mate.

I keep checking my watch, and it's only been five minutes, but it feels like hours.

I've spent the entire time, eyes glued open, staring at the tube leading down my mate's throat.

I know that can't be comfortable. And she's gonna be sore when she wakes up.

Not only her throat, but her jaw probably too. It's holding her mouth open, so it's gonna be dry as a desert.

There's also a small trail of drool that's dripping out of the corner of her mouth.

It's kinda cute.

But every time my eyes go there, I can see the clear plastic so close by in my peripheral vision, so my mind shoots right back to the worst.

At the end of the sixth minute, I finally allow my eyes to travel somewhere other than Maria's mouth or my watch.

They rolled over her face. She's beautiful. I mean, I knew that before I saw her unconscious, but now she's just so. . . Peaceful. When she's awake, I don't like how she looks at me. She's either looking at me like I'm the most annoying person she's ever encountered, or like I'm the dumbest.

Why couldn't it be something like fear? It's easily reversible and kills two birds with one stone. There wouldn't be any resistance and she could be an example for everyone else.

But no, she has to roll her eyes, laugh like she knows something I don't, and keep her chin up.

Why does she have to do that? It's the most obvious sign I have no control over the situation. It doesn't help me in my dealings and makes me look bad.

I only need it to fall for a second. After, I would pick it right back up.

And things would be so much easier.

But now, her chin's up because her head needs to be tilted at an angle so she doesn't sophisticate. And she's not rolling her eyes, talking back or laughing at me.

She's just laying there. Still, and. . . And helpless.

That doesn't leave a good feeling in my stomach.

But she also looks pure.

Like the young girl she is, I suppose.

The bold look she always holds in her eyes makes that fact slip my mind, I guess. She's only seventeen.

'Yes, and probably very inexperienced.'

'Ki!'

'What?! Don't worry, we'll fix that.'

I rolled my eyes.

He has no filter.

My gaze went straight back to her.

This all just makes my heart ache for her more. How beautiful she is, but also how much pain she's in.

How much pain she's in because of me.

I can't believe I did this to her.

And after today, I have to go on hurting her, because backing out of this deal is not an option.

I just wish she would just, compromise. It's not that hard. She's making it so much more complicated than it needs to be. She's the one that can change all this. Is it really that hard to just submit? And if she does, everyone else will follow.

Ugh! Why does she have to be so difficult!

'I know, many have told her we will be just and kind rulers. Once we get through the bumpy patch, we could actually start living up to that. But noooo.'

I nodded and sighed out of frustration.

'. . . Ki, this doesn't get in the way of your plan, does it?'

'No, but it's going to take a while to get any sort of results. It was going to anyway, but this might have set us back a bit.'

'Okay, as long as we're not ruined.'

'Oh, far from it.'

I nodded. 'Good.'

It was hard eyes that fell on Maria next.

And then they immediately softened when they took in her state again.

Okay, enough plotting against her. We'll have her to ourselves soon. Her love and submission.

Well, maybe not soon, but at some point.

For now we can feel guilty for what we did.

'. . . Look at her, Ki.'

'Don't remind me.'