374 Test Time
(Winona)
I close the bathroom door behind me, leaning back against it as my heart pounds against my ribs. I clutch the pregnancy test in one hand, determined to finally go through with it.
No more interruptions, no more stalling. It’s time to know. Sitting on the toilet, I’m ready.
Before I can open the package, my phone rings. I nearly drop the test, the sudden sound jolting me. I pull my phone out of the pocket of my jeans now pooled at my ankles, and Jayden’s name flashes on the
screen.
My thumb hovers over the decline button–I want to be alone in this moment. But then, something stops me. It’s as if he knows I need him, even though he’s not with me.
I swipe to answer, bracing myself, hoping he doesn’t pick up on the anxiety in my voice.
“Hey, babe,” I say, clutching the test in one hand.
“Hey,” he replies, his tone warm and steady. There’s a softness in his voice, the kind he only uses when he’s about to say something important.
“I’m just about to take off for London, but I had to call you before I went. I was down at the cottage earlier, and… I don’t know, it just hit me.”
“Hit you?” I ask, my voice wavering slightly. I try to shake off the unease, forcing myself to focus on his words.
I fumble with the box trying to open it one–handed as I sit on the toilet.
“Yeah, Being there, seeing everything Gus set up–it made me realize something. He really did all this with me in mind. This whole setup, the way he built that place… it’s like he tried to create a world for me.”
“That’s how I felt too.”
“I’ve been holding so much resentment. But standing there, I realized… my past doesn’t have to define me, you know? I’m the one who gets to decide what family means, not Judy or Gus or Greg. Just… us.”
The warmth in his voice seeps into me, soothing my nerves like a balm. I cling to his words, savoring every one, but the test in my hand distracts the moment. I try to focus on the love that Jayden has built
with me.
I pull the test from the box, finally. The box drops on the floor.
“I’m more committed to this than I’ve ever been,” he continues. “Our life, our family… Whatever happens, nothing can change that.”
The raw sincerity in his tone brings a lump to my throat, and I swallow, barely holding back a tear.” Jayden, that means everything,” I murmur, gripping the test so tightly my knuckles go white.
I’m trying to keep my voice steady, but I know he’ll pick up on something. He always does.
A pause stretches between us, and I hear a hint of concern in his voice. “Your okay? What are you up to? I can hear rustling or shuffling. Did you find my chocolate stash?”
374 Test Time
+25 BONUS
I
I glance at the test taunting me. My mind races for a quick excuse. “Just… testing some paint colors,” I say, trying to sound casual. “The painter’s asking for some answers, and it’s kind of last minute. You have a chocolate stash?”
“No. No I definitely don’t.” He chuckles, his laughter easing the tension creeping through me. “And hey, remember–you can call me anytime, alright? Whether it’s paint colors or just… whatever. Just to hear my
voice.”
I smile, the sincerity of his words mingling with the nervous energy bubbling inside me. “I know. I love you, Jayden.
“Love you, too, babe. Always. No matter what.”
I hang up, and the call screen fades to black. His voice lingers in my mind, his words giving me a strength I didn’t realize I needed. But now, the reality of what I’m holding floods back in.
Taking a deep breath, I force myself to focus. My fingers tear open the package, my hand’s trembling as I put it where it needs to be. It’s all happening so fast, but in slow motion at the same time.
go through the motions, each step mechanical, as if my body has taken over while my mind numbly follows along.
I squeeze my eyes shut, not ready to face the truth just yet. I remind myself of the rational answer I’ve convinced myself of. The law of averages, the likelihood that this is Jayden’s if it’s anything at all.
We’ve been together so much, and with him… it was always unguarded. It has to be Jayden’s, right? But I can’t be pregnant, I know that. I don’t want to hope.
I let out my breath, clenching the edge of the counter until my fingers ache. But my eyes are still clamped ‘shut. The seconds stretch out, every beat of my heart echoing in my ears.
This could be the start of a new life, a miracle that wasn’t supposed to happen, or it could be a ticking time bomb that shatters everything we’ve rebuilt. But either way it could be a baby, my baby.
Finally, I take a deep breath and open my eyes, but I don’t look down just yet. I can’t. Has it been long enough? Why didn’t I time it instead of closing my eyes?
My hands shake as I lean forward, forcing myself to look. The room feels like a chasm, like everything is on hold, waiting for me.
The test is there on the counter, and the tiny window holds the answer to everything. My heart races as I
look at it.
The result revealing itself in that tiny space.
374 Test Time
(Winona)
I close the bathroom door behind me, leaning back against it as my heart pounds against my ribs. I clutch the pregnancy test in one hand, determined to finally go through with it.
No more interruptions, no more stalling. It’s time to know. Sitting on the toilet, I’m ready.
Before I can open the package, my phone rings. I nearly drop the test, the sudden sound jolting me. I pull my phone out of the pocket of my jeans now pooled at my ankles, and Jayden’s name flashes on the
screen.
My thumb hovers over the decline button–I want to be alone in this moment. But then, something stops me. It’s as if he knows I need him, even though he’s not with me.
I swipe to answer, bracing myself, hoping he doesn’t pick up on the anxiety in my voice.
“Hey, babe,” I say, clutching the test in one hand.
“Hey,” he replies, his tone warm and steady. There’s a softness in his voice, the kind he only uses when he’s about to say something important.
“I’m just about to take off for London, but I had to call you before I went. I was down at the cottage earlier, and… I don’t know, it just hit me.”
“Hit you?” I ask, my voice wavering slightly. I try to shake off the unease, forcing myself to focus on his words.
I fumble with the box trying to open it one–handed as I sit on the toilet.
“Yeah. Being there, seeing everything Gus set up–it made me realize something. He really did all this with. me in mind. This whole setup, the way he built that place… it’s like he tried to create a world for me.”
“That’s how I felt too.”
“I’ve been holding so much resentment. But standing there, I realized… my past doesn’t have to define me, you know? I’m the one who gets to decide what family means, not Judy or Gus or Greg. Just… us.”
The warmth in his voice seeps into me, soothing my nerves like a balm. I cling to his words, savoring every one, but the test in my hand distracts the moment. I try to focus on the love that Jayden has built
with me.
I pull the test from the box, finally. The box drops on the floor.
“I’m more committed to this than I’ve ever been,” he continues. “Our life, our family… Whatever happens, nothing can change that.”
The raw sincerity in his tone brings a lump to my throat, and I swallow, barely holding back a tear.” Jayden, that means everything,” I murmur, gripping the test so tightly my knuckles go white.
I’m trying to keep my voice steady, but I know he’ll pick up on something. He always does.
A pause stretches between us, and I hear a hint of concern in his voice. “You okay? What are you up to? I can hear rustling or shuffling. Did you find my chocolate stash?”
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