"I know," Jin Liwei whispered back. "I know that this is the real you."
Iris smiled and blinked away the tears filling her eyes. He also smiled at her but his expression turned pensive again as he continued his analysis.
"I ordered a background check on you—I mean, of Long Xiulan because of...you already know about me concealing the truth behind the car accident," he said with a heavy sigh before massaging his temples. "It’s the most shameful thing that I’ve ever done in my entire life, my biggest sin. Even if you’re telling me now that you aren’t really Long Xiulan and that the one I wronged before isn’t you, I still shouldn’t have done that. It was heartless, ruthless and malicious of me."
"I know, Liwei." Her tone was gentle. She wanted to go and comfort him but decided to give him space for now to process everything in his mind. "Xiulan...her grudge regarding her death had already been resolved including the one that she had against you for your involvement in her car accident."
That caught his attention. He thought for a few moments before his eyes lit up with realization. "That night at the rotunda when I confessed my crime of hiding the truth about the accident, you attacked and beat me up. Both of us were emotional that night but remembering it now, I did notice something weird. Even as you were attacking and cursing me so viciously, sometimes it looked like you didn’t want to. It was like...like you were fighting with yourself."
"Because I was," she said. "I was fighting with myself. Or more accurately, I was fighting with a remnant of Long Xiulan left inside this body. Her grudge awakened and went berserk when you confessed your involvement in the car accident that resulted to her own death. The remnant’s grudge became too strong at that moment that it wrested control of the body from me. That’s why even when I didn’t want to hurt you, my body still attacked you."
He looked alarmed. "What do you mean that it wrested control of the body from you? Does it do that all the time? Don’t tell me that there are times that the one I’m spending my time with isn’t you but that...that...what do you call it again? Remnant?" Then he looked horrified as a thought popped in his mind. "It’s you that I’m always making love with, right? The remnant or whatever it is never switches with you during our intimate moments...right?"
She was amused at the direction of his thoughts but recognized that they were all valid concerns. Her tone was serious when she answered him. "Don’t worry, Liwei. The one you’ve been making love with all this time has always been me. Nobody else. And even if the remnant is still there which I don’t think it is, I would never allow it to take over and intrude on our intimate moments. You’re mine, Jin Liwei. Only mine."
"En, I’m yours." He paused. "But is the remnant—"
"I think it’s no longer inside me. After resolving its grudge last year, I haven’t felt it surface again since then. My hope is that it’s completely gone but I can’t be too sure."
She didn’t know that the remnant had now completely merged with her, affecting her own original personality in a subtle way and triggering the expansion of her emotional range. This was why she had become more open with her emotions, sometimes to the point of being extreme. Perhaps her current uncontrollable mood swings due to her pregnancy were also influenced by her merging with the remnant. Nobody could confirm this because she herself wasn’t aware of it.
Other unnoticed effects of merging with the remnant were her stronger sense of acceptance of her new identity as Long Xiulan, no longer feeling an instinctive rejection against it, and also why some memories of her past life as Evelina were slowly becoming more distant and slowly forgotten except for the most prominent ones.
Comments
The readers' comments on the novel: His Genius Wife Is A Superstar