Hitched & Hitched Again: A Comedy of Marital Mayhem novel Chapter 1268

Tarquin nodded. “Yeah, but I’ll need a little chemical help.”

“Chemical help? You mean something that erases memories? As far as I know, there’s no drug on earth that can make someone forget a chunk of time just like that,” Tracey said, frowning.

Tracey sighed. “Even I haven’t managed to invent anything like that, and I’ve tried.”

Tarquin grinned. “No, Grandma, you misunderstood. I’m talking about a hallucinogen.”

“…Oh, a hallucinogen. Well, we have some of that around here. We used to use it to scare off hunters and trespassers,” Tracey replied, a hint of pride in her voice. “But it’s got its downsides. It doesn’t work the same on everyone.”

Elysia piped in, her tone gentle but firm. “Tarquin, you know Grandma and Grandpa just want to live quietly up here in the mountains. Off the grid. They don’t want anyone finding us.”

The message was clear: whatever Tarquin did, it had to keep every single trespasser quiet. No loose ends.

Tarquin nodded again, serious this time. “I get it. The hallucinogen is just a backup, not the main plan. I’ve got other tricks up my sleeve. You just stay with Grandma and help her out. I’ll take care of the rest.”

Elysia looked at him with pure gratitude and no small amount of admiration. “Okay!”

She turned to Tracey. “Grandma, you can trust Tarquin. If he says he’ll handle it, he will.”

Tracey’s eyes softened as she looked at Tarquin. “You’re a good kid. Thank you.”

“You’re too kind, Grandma.”

Whenever Tarquin was around Tracey, he was the perfect grandson—well-mannered and sweet.

He figured: love me, love my family. Elysia’s grandma was his grandma too, as far as he was concerned.

“If you need anything else besides the hallucinogen, just say the word. Make yourself at home,” Tracey said, then led Tarquin to her cozy little cabin and handed him the jar of the homemade stuff.

Afterwards, she and Elysia headed off with the kids to tidy up the rooms and get dinner started—probably a hearty beef stew, some cornbread, and a big apple pie cooling on the windowsill.

With the hallucinogen in hand, Tarquin followed Elliot to Howard’s room.

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