I Am The Luna (Moonlight Muse) novel Chapter 20

SEBASTIAN.

“I can’t believe you never told me any of this,” Jai says quietly.

The sunlight is shining through the hospital window as we discuss everything. I did tell Dad what had happened, but of course, he simply blamed me for it.

This pack is meant to be my responsibility, and it should be. It is my fault that someone was able to get in and try to kill her. As the Alpha, it’s my job to keep everyone safe.

“I know, and I should have. But it was my mistake to act so blindly.”

“Ashbane in your system, remember?” Jai reminds me as if it’s obvious and enough of an excuse.

But it’s not, I should have been more careful, everything I did was wrong.

“No Jai, it’s not an excuse. I fucked up, and it’s on me to make amends, not blame it on something else. I can’t make an excuse for myself.” I sigh. “Also… We won’t mention the Ashbane to anyone. The doctor also knows this, and I have the only copy of the report. He didn’t file it in my reports. I don’t want to alert whoever it is that we figured this out.

“Well then, be careful what you consume. You’ve somehow been ingesting a large amount on a daily basis if we go by the test result.” Jai says, picking up the paper that sits on the hospital table between us.

Two cups of steaming tea that a nurse had brought in not long sits between us. I pick mine up, nodding in agreement to what he said as I take a gulp, but it does nothing to warm up the cold and emptiness I feel inside.

“I don’t know how…but with Ashbane it means someone would have had to be near to instigate me into thinking what I was thinking. It doesn’t just work on its own. Someone is telling me what to do…”

That thought alone is chilling, especially for someone in my position.

“And since you don’t seem to remember, I’m assuming they knew exactly when you were consuming it and when it’ll take effect,” Jai mutters, folding the test result and passing it to me. “Keep it safe.”

I slip the piece of paper into my pocket and tilt my head. “Or it’s someone who I’m around daily or often enough, so because they’re always around… I wouldn’t realise.”

“I bet it’s that awful woman that you really need to get rid of. I mean, I get why you did what you did but flaunting an ex in front of your mate, really? Even as a cover is fucking stupid.”

“I know. Like I said, I fucked up.” I glare coldly at him. He doesn’t need to remind me.

“Ok ok, fine. I’ll drop it but I really wouldn’t put it past her to be the one administering it.”

I shake my head. “She’s not had anything against Zaia…”

She has. The negative vibe and the remarks and jabs she’s always made towards Zaia now seem a little too obvious, but I just turned a blind eye to it… is it her?

I mean, I’ve felt she is dangerous, stupid and annoying, yes… but is she really this cunning?

The chance that it is her is low, but I can’t rule her out, I need to find out about her apparent kidnapping.

Anger flares inside of me and the glaring reality of how foolish I have been screams inside of my head.

I was blinded… I can’t blame Dad for being so disappointed in me.

“The pregnancy… I mean… I have a confession.” Jai mutters.

I cock a brow, waiting for him to continue.

“I knew the twins were yours… but you were with Annalise, and when Val explained to me that Zaia was scared, you’ll take the kids, she didn’t want you to know. And yeah, I agree, you were being a dick and so I respected her decision.” Jai admits, making me look up at him sharply.

“So you knew.”

He sighs. “Valerie told me when that entire report fiasco happened. Plus, there’s more…” He sounds uneasy as he glances around as if making sure no one can hear us.

“What is it, Jai?”

He picks up his cup and takes a gulp.

“It’s about Zaia… when they did some tests on her and she found out she was pregnant, they also discovered she’s really weak. Valerie felt she was being poisoned and had some tests done… Zaia was being poisoned. Right here under our noses.”

My stomach twists, and I look down, my heart thundering in my ears.

“And why didn’t you tell me something so important?” I ask quietly.

“Because you weren’t listening, Sebastian, you didn’t deserve to know. I know you would have become possessive of the babies, but in the process, you would have only hurt her more.” He answers.

I look away, guilt washing over me, and here I was, not thinking I could get any angrier at myself.

She is going through so much and I've been blind to it all...

Zaia poisoned… and me taking Ashbane, it isn’t a coincidence.

“There’s more.” He begins hesitantly.

“What is it? Tell me everything, Jai.” I warn.