Judas kiss novel Chapter 45

Time was going by fast. Della had dinner dates with Spencer, Leo spent time with his father. Andre would always treasure the moments when he would drop Leo off back home because that was the only time he could lay his eyes on her after the birthday party. He didn't understand why she was so distant with him. She looked away whenever he looked at her. She didn't look at him whenever they spoke. She was always at a distance away from him. Della was aware that she cared for Andre and that one way or another, he was her first love and they shared some sort of bond. Well on her side at least, she was afraid-

She knew that she would easily give into him. He had this effect on her, he always did. It wasn't the way his baby blue eyes held her gaze or the way they fluttered pleasantly giving her a smile… the smile that she loves and adored. The dimpled smile that her son had inherited. Everything was going well at least.. civil so how did they end up naked in the middle of her Kitchen.

"Della-"

"Don't say anything.." Della hissed, she didn't know what she was feeling. It had to be guilt, after all these years of not needing this man.. she gave into him. She felt utterly embarrassed, disgraced, shameful. She felt like a stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid..

God knows all she wanted to do after this is go shower and cry under the blankets. Andre was quiet, he didn't know what to say, it had all happened so fast. They were both just so hungry for each other and more than anything; infatuated with need. He wasn't going to lie and say he didn't miss this. He missed it dearly, he missed being with his wife in every sense. No one could ever compare to the intimacy that they shared together. It was absolutely heaven and they both knew it. They shared such a beautiful chemistry that made their intimacy beyond savory.

"I'm sorry." Andre said softly. "I will leave if you want me to.."

Della didn't say anything, as she just sat there in the same stance. She looked between her legs-

"I pulled out." Andre said quietly buttoning his shirt.

He immediately regretted saying anything. He shouldn't have said anything. Della felt like a prostitute, while Spencer is in Portugal for two days... she is here doing this. Spencer absolutely adored her and she felt like a betrayer. The worst scum on earth not just sleep with anyone but it had to be her ex-husband. He didn't force her into anything. She did it willingly, she was filled with need as soon as she came, common sense immediately came seeping in along with guilt. She looked at Andre's now messy blonde hair, hickeys on his neck.. she clearly did that.

It had just been so long.

But that was no excuse.

"You shouldn't have came here Andre." Della finally let out, on the verge of tears.

"I swear I had no intention that this would happen okay? I just came to bring back the signed birth certificate that's all."

"But you know.." She almost yelled, she picked up her oversized white shirt and quickly put it on. She knew Andre's eyes were trained on her body. She had not even shaved her lower area-

But Andre didn't seem to care.

"Know what?" Andre snapped now buckling his belt.

"You knew this would happen.. this is why we can't be alone in the same room." Della said quickly wiping a tear away, it was all regret but deep down inside she wasn't going to lie and say she didn't enjoy every minute of having him pulse inside her.

"It's not my fault, Adela." Andre said gently.

"I'm in a relationship with someone, this is so wrong.." She said pacing around, not minding the fact that her panties were still on the floor and so were her black tights that she was wearing before this man ravaged her into a pleasure that she had missed but wouldn't admit it.

"I know.. kills me everyday just knowing that you probably do this with him all the time." Andre spat, unable to control his anger and jealousy.

"I don't." Della spoke in a low voice.

"That's why I feel horrible, I haven't been able to give myself to him but with you-" She groaned. "I hate myself."

"So why are you with him and not me?" Andre demanded.

"Because you and I ended. There can never be an us, it ended the day you snatched your ring back and threw the divorce papers at me. Above all he treats me right and that's honestly all I want." She said the last part as slow as a whisper.

Andre was hurt.

"I never treated you right?" He asked in a hurt voice. His fingers ran through his golden blonde hair clearly frustrated, clenching his jaw.

Della kept quiet.

"You just turned out to be an asshole anyways. You probably married me because you felt sorry for me and of course the fact that I wouldn't sleep with you until the wedding.." She said closing her eyes heaving a huge sigh.

Andre was utterly shocked.

"I loved you Della and don't tell me you don't believe it." He said in an accusing voice. Della only chuckled, tears brimming her eyes.

"You didn't, we both know that and if you did.. things would be different. You would have believed me over your mother and Leondre would have both parents and wouldn't have been born outside of marriage but it's okay. I'm glad you showed me your true feelings earlier before.. i had given you more kids."

"Wow Adela." Andre said in a defeated voice.

"I loved you and you know I did." He sighed. "I still do."