Kylie Bray (Love, Hate and Billions) novel Chapter 54

Vincent is killing more and more. I say nothing because I know once he's done he will take my body, lighting that spark I have come to crave.

He only fucks me when we're at these places, and there are dead people everywhere.

At home he is another person, he is caring, he touches me tenderly.

He makes love to me every night, but he never sleeps next to me.

Once he takes my body at home, we eat, and dance and just as morning comes he leaves me alone in his suite.

He doesn't call and I go crazy. I send him messages that he ignores then he comes back.

He talks while he drinks. I ask him where has he been but he never answers.

Same story, different day.

He is all I think about, all I want, my craving.

My mind and my heart is no longer numb. I have this inner war inside of me, overcrowding me- sanity, love, and pain.

Each day it is coming, I don't know what it is, but it is like a storm brewing, my mind is telling me I need it. But at other times I feel like I am breaking apart.

It's two months, two months of bloodshed, two months of watching people getting tortured. Sixty-one days since I walked away from that young dead boy.

I am not haunted by the men that hurt me. They killed Kylie, and they gave me strength.

I know that now.

I can watch Vincent torture them, without an ounce of remorse, even knowing it is wrong, understanding I should stop him.

Whenever that thought comes to my mind I shut it down. It is like a switch, a trigger.

I can't control it.

But that boy, his green eyes they come for me at night, telling me things that I know, things I am just not ready to accept.

The same things I shy away from because Vincent Stone is my addiction but he is also my disease.

I can't feed my addiction without accepting the repercussions. It is just a fucked up cycle of love, need, hate and pain. Sooner or later it all blows, poof.

“I’ve always wondered what death feels like.”

Vincent is sitting on the white leather couch.

I am on the floor, directly opposite him. My phone in my hand with fifty three missed calls.