Login via

Nothing Matters, except YOU & Me novel Chapter 683

In the unhappy atmosphere, they ended their discussion. Leon knew this was Heather’s way of protecting herself; in fact, she had hurt him many times by acting just like this.

For the last few minutes of the journey, they remained in silence and did not speak even as she exited the car. This time, he stayed in the driver’s seat throughout the entire process and did not get out to see her to the door.

While Heather could hear the car idling behind her, she didn’t turn back. Only after he had driven and she had walked very far away from each other did she frailly look over her shoulder at the long, empty stretch of road.

Resigned, she turned to face forward once again, thinking that she understood Leon so little now. Perhaps she never really knew him. After so long, she finally understood one thing, which was that the friends and family she surrounded herself with wouldn’t necessarily stay forever.

Self-deprecatingly, she smiled, thinking about the fact that the people by her side were leaving her one by one. Her existence was becoming more and more detestable and at this rate, she didn’t even know why she kept on living.

When she entered the hall, it was empty. There wasn’t a single person, so she walked into the living room alone and threw herself down on the couch. Only after taking in the familiar fragrance of the air did she feel like she had returned home. No matter what she thought of her family, at the end of the day, this place was still her home.

Somehow, she fell asleep on the couch and was discovered by the butler in the middle of the night. Instead of waking her up, he found a warm blanket and gently covered her with it.

Well-aware of how lightly she slept, he tried his best not to wake her up. In fact, he didn’t even try to lay her down into a more comfortable position for fear of waking her.

At around 4 or 5 AM, the living room grew chilly enough to wake her up. As she rubbed her arms, the blanket slid off her.

Opening her eyes, Heather took in her surroundings as well as the blanket in her lap. The previous night’s memories were a little hazy and she had no idea who put this blanket on her.

Since it was still early, she stood up uncomfortably from the couch. Her back ached sharply and she scarcely dared believe she fell asleep sitting up on the couch.

After picking up the blanket and depositing it on the couch, she surveyed her surroundings. Since she couldn’t see anyone else, she decided to retreat to her room. After all, she had yet to remove her makeup.

At this hour, silence was paramount, so she stepped lightly and crept slowly up the stairs. Finally, she reached the second floor, but she still had to cross the corridor to get to her room and she was afraid of waking the others up with her footsteps.

Nonetheless, her carefulness meant she was successful in her mission. Quietly, she opened the door to her room, which looked like it always did despite how long it felt like she hadn’t come home.

Now that she had returned to her own familiar, comfortable space, she felt inexplicably tired. All of a sudden, she felt like her strength had left her body.

Her bed was only a few steps away from her but she couldn’t lie down just yet—she had to clean herself first. Hence, she dragged herself to her bathroom, feeling so devoid of energy that she might fall to the ground asleep in the next second.

Warm water flowed from her showerhead and she shut her eyes tightly underneath it. She loved the feeling of being cleansed by water. If it weren’t for the fact that she was so tired, she would have soaked herself properly in the tub.

By the time Heather left the shower, she was lightly fragrant with the familiar scent of her body wash. Heavily, she threw herself down onto her bed. Its softness enveloped her and as she lay there, she let out a child-like smile.

No matter what terrible things took place during the day, everything would be fine once she returned home and lay down in her own bed. With child-like stubbornness, she burrowed underneath her covers, determined to enjoy this comfortable moment.

By now, it was already 5 AM. Inexplicably, she had lost her sleepiness, so she stared aimlessly at the ceiling, wondering if she would fall asleep in a bit. At any rate, she felt comfortable right now.

It had been a long time since she felt so comfortable and only now did she understand one thing, which was that she would only feel comfortable in her own bed. Never would she be comfortable with sleeping at others’.

It was ironic that the one place she was trying to avoid was also the one place that gave her peace of mind. It seemed there were many things she wouldn’t understand until their time came.

With her eyes open, she awaited dawn’s approach. It would likely take a while before the sky lightened completely. If she looked out of the window right now, the sky outside was still inky dark and she hoped she would fall asleep before it grew light since she didn’t want to be disturbed by the sun.

Sometimes, Heather wondered what lives the people her age were living. If her life were to become commonplace, what kind of ordinary folk would she be? It was a question that popped up in her mind from time to time.

Recently, the thought was stronger than ever before. She could already imagine the future that awaited her but, given that life was giving her less and less to live for, she couldn’t accept that she had to continue on this path. By now, she was even thinking about giving up everything before her.

The life she longed for the most right now was to run away from her current difficult circumstances to the countryside where she could lead the carefree life of a farm owner.

Of course, she didn’t tell anyone about that fantasy, since it would never come true, anyway. When everyone, including herself, had accepted that she would become an outstanding businesswoman, her future was already fixed in stone and all of her thoughts had to revolve around that idea.

Comments

The readers' comments on the novel: Nothing Matters, except YOU & Me