Crossing lines (Noah and Aiden) novel Chapter 182

Chapter 182

“Aiden-

“That’s what my statement says,” he interrupted, eyes wet but steady. “I wrote it after I got home. Officially, it says I used my position to coerce you. You’ll have to endure the embarrassment of being seen as a victim, but if they believe I exploited you, it shields you. It salvages your career.”

“No!” My voice cracked like a whip as I shot to my feet, fingers tearing through my hair. “Aiden, no. What the actual fuck? You didn’t coerce me! For God’s sake, if anyone pressured anyone, it was the other way around.”

“I knew better,” he said, voice breaking, shoulders hunched. “I knew exactly how wrong it was, what I was asking of you. You weren’t a fling, Noah-you were an obsession. You are my obsession. I can’t think of anything else. And the level of…” he inhaled sharply, “…the level of pleasure I take in hurting you, dominating you—it isn’t normal. I’m messed up, and I’ve messed you up. Now I’m trying to do the only thing left to protect your future.”

That was when he finally cracked. In one rough motion, he lurched to his feet, crossed to where I’d set the bottle, and snatched it up. He tipped it back and drank-one swallow, two, three-his throat working as the liquor vanished.

“Stop!” I surged forward, yanking the bottle down. “Are you trying to kill yourself?”

He averted his gaze, and I felt another piece of my heart splinter.

“You didn’t force me into anything I didn’t want,” I said, my voice low but fierce. “After all these months, I’m shocked you don’t know that. Nobody makes me do a damn thing-and you know it.”

He gave a rough, humorless sound that might have been a laugh, because he knew I was right. We both did. Almost nobody could make me bend. Almost. Truth was, he was the one exception to my every rule.

I pried the bottle from his trembling hands and set it out of reach. Then I did what I’d been afraid to do all night: I placed my palms on his shoulders, sliding up to the sides of his neck, cupping his jaw. My thumbs brushed the roughness of his stubble. I drew a slow breath and steeled myself to be more vulnerable than I’d ever been in my life.

“I wanted everything, Aiden,” I whispered, the words catching somewhere between confession and apology. “I wanted you. I wanted this. These past months you’ve made me feel stronger, more capable, more alive than I’ve ever been. You’re the only thing that’s cut through the weight pressing on me and let me see the finish line. Every moment with you has felt like breathing clean air after years underground. I’ve loved it. All of it.”

I prayed he was drunk enough not to notice, or at least not to remember, the tears streaking down my face. His own eyes shone wet, but at least he had the whiskey to blame. I leaned in and kissed him, tasting the burn of liquor and something sweet underneath on his tongue. I didn’t know how to say everything churning in me–maybe because I didn’t even know what it was. I only knew something precious was being torn from me, and I wasn’t ready to let go. I pulled back, searching his face, wanting to try again to tell him….

But his knees suddenly gave way. He folded down, arms circling my waist, forehead pressed into my stomach. Instinctively my arms went around his head, holding him there, my fingers combing through his hair while his body shook with quiet, ragged sobs.