I Forgot I Loved You Alpha (Ellie and Nolan) novel Chapter 133

Chapter 133

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Cassian.

Thesitated before answering, then hit the video call. His face filled the screen a second later-tired, but smiling faintly.

“Hey,” he said. “You look like you haven’t slept.”

I let out a shaky breath. “You heard.”

“Hard not to,” he replied, rubbing the back of his neck. “Half the packs are talking about it already. Nolan of Silver Fant confessing his undying love in front of half the damn court-It’s… something.”

I grimaced. “I didn’t ask for it.”

“I know.” His tone softened. “But you should know-whatever it means for him, it doesn’t change what you’ve built here. Or what you’ve survived.”

I nodded, but the guilt still sat heavy in my stomach. “How are the boys?”

His expression brightened slightly. “Settling in. I moved them into the packhouse this morning, figured they could use the extra attention. August has a little ear infection, but that’s normal. The healers are checking on them regularly. They’re safe, Ellie.”

“Cassian, I feel awful about this,” I said quietly. “You didn’t have to-”

He cut me off with a look. “Don’t. You’re family. You know that.”

My throat tightened. I blinked hard, forcing back the sting in my eyes. “Thank you.”

“Always.” He leaned back in his chair, exhaling. “Listen, things are shifting fast. Nolan’s confession stirred the pot more than either of you realize.”

“What do you mean?” I asked warily.

“In light of everything-the election, the messenger rumors-Nolan making a public declaration of his love will cause problems. I would say it seems staged but, with his reputation as an emotionless cynic, I don’t think anyone believes him capable of faking emotion like that.”

“It certainly wasn’t fake,” I agreed softly.

“So, people are going to be talking about it for two reasons. One, Nolan has a heart. It’s going to comfort some people to know that he isn’t completely cold. You don’t want a leader who doesn’t care for his people, right?”

“That’s true… it could actually help soften his reputation,” I agree thoughtfully. “What’s the other reason?”

“You. Not just anyone would be capable of winning over a man like that. Some people are going to take this as confirmation of your divine connection. You should be careful who you trust right now.”

I nodded again, unease coiling in my chest. “I will.”

We talked for a few more minutes-small updates, little reassurances-before the call ended. I set the phone down, staring at the dark screen for a long time.

The world outside the window was quiet. Too still. A storm waiting to break.

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Chapter 132

And somewhere, deep down, I could feel it-something moving toward us. Something inevitable.

D

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Chapter 133

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Chapter 133

Ellie POV

The packhouse was quiet again. The kind of quiet that settled only when people were afraid to speak.

Of course, everyone had heard about Nolan’s confession by now. It was only last night that it had happened, but I could tell by the tension at breakfast that word had gotten around.

I stood by the window, the afternoon sun spilling soft light through the lingering rainclouds and across the floor. It should have been peaceful, but my chest still ached from the weight of Nolan’s words.

Nolan entered the room, his footsteps soft as he approached. I didn’t look at him, I didn’t need to. I knew that he was looking at me.

The silence stretched between us for what felt like an eternity. There was so much to say, and yet I couldn’t think of anything. All that was going through my head right now was the image of August and Ian, each boy with Nolan’s features and dark hair.

He deserved to know. He deserved to be part of their lives, didn’t he?

Certainly, they deserved to have their father. I was an orphan, so I knew how hard it was to grow up without family. It wouldn’t be fair for me to hide them from theirs.

Ever since the incident at the altar, my memories had been coming back in bits and pieces. I saw flashes of the past with Cassian and Alaric. Happy memories of the time before I was in the orphanage in the rogue zone.

It was a shock to my system to realize that I was the daughter of an alpha and luna. I hadn’t been able to bring myself to tell Nolan about it, and Cassian had agreed to keep it quiet. It was my truth to share, he said.

But I wasn’t sure if I would ever be able to. I had so many secrets now, I was starting to feel like I didn’t even know myself anymore.

But that’s not all that I was remembering. My early life with Nolan was coming back to me, too. It was mortifying to know that I had been so desperate for his attention, for his affection.

I had been truly pathetic. Yet, no matter how much I tried to win him over, he had never shown me more than disdain. It was so different than the way he was with me now.

It was all I could think about last night. I’d hardly slept as a result.

“I meant what I said,” he began quietly. “Every word of it.”

My fingers tightened around the edge of the windowsill. “I know.”

For a long moment, neither of us spoke. The air carried the scent of rain, soft and clean, the kind that clung to the skin and made the world feel smaller.

Finally, I turned toward him. “Things have changed between us, Nolan. I can’t pretend they haven’t. But…” I swallowed, struggling to find the right words. “I can’t forget everything that came before.”

Nolan nodded once, eyes falling to the floor. “I wouldn’t ask you to.”

He moved to sit on the edge of one of the stone planters, elbows on his knees. “You were right that night-about

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Chapter 133

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everything. I was cruel to you. I told myself it was your fault, that you made me weak, when really, I was just scared.”

My brow furrowed. “Scared?”

“Of the mate bond,” he admitted. “Of what it meant to want someone because the goddess said I should. I thought if I could resist it-if I could prove I was stronger than the pull-it would mean something. That I was in control.” He let out a bitter laugh. “But all it meant was that I hurt you. Over and over again.”

My throat tightened. He wasn’t just making excuses, he sounded exhausted, stripped bare. And that made it harder to hold onto the anger I’d built my walls with.

“Nolan…”

“I’m not asking you to forgive me,” he said, cutting in gently. “I just need you to know I see it now. What I did.. Who I was. I was terrible to you. I was a monster.”

I took a small step closer. The pale light softened his features, made him look younger, more vulnerable than I’d ever seen him. Or maybe I just hadn’t looked hard enough before.

Part of me wanted to tell him everything then-the truth about the boys, about how I’d hidden their existence not just out of fear, but because I hadn’t trusted him to protect them.

I wanted to believe that maybe this new version of Nolan could handle that truth.

But the words stuck in my throat.

Because if I told him, there would be no taking it back. And I didn’t know yet if love-real or not-could survive the weight of what we’d lost.

Instead, I whispered, “Thank you. For saying it.”

He looked up at me then, and something in his expression softened-a mixture of regret and relief. “You deserve better than what I gave you.”

I didn’t answer. I wasn’t sure she could without saying too much.

It was comforting to hear Nolan admit to his flaws, to his cruelty. I hoped that it was a sign of real growth from him and not just the result of his jealousy toward Kieran. But I couldn’t be sure.

I couldn’t be sure of anything when it came to him.

He left just as quietly as he entered, and I relaxed just a fraction when I was alone again. My mind didn’t ease, though. My thoughts remained just as conflicted for the rest of the day.

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