Chapter 83
Jessa
The hallway was quieter than the cafeteria, but my pulse was still pounding in my cars.
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Noah walked beside me, just far enough away that our shoulders didn’t brush, and neither of us said a word.
He didn’t look cocky like usual – none of that charming grin or easy confidence he always wore when he was around people.
He just looked… tired.
We stopped near the doors that led out behind the gym. The glass was fogged slightly from the cold, and the faint buzz of fluorescent lights filled the silence.
Noah rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “So… you wanted to talk?”
I crossed my arms. “I said we should talk. There’s a difference.”
He gave a small nod, eyes dropping to the floor. “Right. Okay.”
The awkwardness stretched until I couldn’t stand it. “Why’d you come to my house?”
His head lifted, eyes meeting mine. “Because you wouldn’t talk to me here. And because I owed you more than a hallway apology.”
I laughed – sharp, humorless. “You think showing up on my porch fixes everything?”
“No,” he said quietly. “I think it was the only way to show you I meant it.”
That threw me a little. His tone wasn’t defensive
–
it was raw. Honest.
Still, I wasn’t ready to make it easy for him.
“Do you even know how humiliated I felt that night?” I said, the words spilling out before I could stop them. “Standing there while Daniel laughed and you didn’t say a thing?”
He winced. “Yeah. I know. I should’ve said something.”
“You didn’t. That’s the point.”
“I know,” he said again, louder this time. “I froze, okay? Jackson was right there. Everyone was. I-” He exhaled hard, shaking his head. “I messed up.”
I stared at him, waiting for the rest.
He looked back, his jaw tightening. “I don’t expect you to forgive me. But I want you to know it wasn’t a joke
to me. You weren’t.”
18:35 Mon, Oct 13
Chapter 83
Something in my chest twisted. I wanted to believe him. I hated that I wanted to.
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“You say that now.” I said. “But where was that energy when I needed you to actually stand up for me? You care so much about your image, Noah. You and my brother both. Everything’s about how it looks – what people think.”
He didn’t argue. He just looked at me with that quiet kind of guilt that made it hard to keep the wall up.
“I’m not proud of that,” he said finally. “You think I like pretending half the time? Acting like I’ve got it together when I don’t? I hate it, Jess. I hate that I care what people say. But when you’ve got everyone watching coaches, recruiters, Jackson – it’s like you can’t slip, even once. You can’t let them see you’re human.”
His voice cracked on that last word.
I swallowed hard. “So that makes it okay to hurt someone else?”
“No.” He met my eyes. “It makes it worse.”

“Have you ever been invisible, Noah? Not the kind of invisible where people don’t know your name — the kind where they do, but still pretend you’re not there unless it’s convenient for them. The kind where they laugh at you for not fitting the mold.”

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