*Valka*
"Not dressed like that, no," I say.
Lucien’s gaze drops to his clothes. Admittedly, there’s nothing extravagant about them--a simple white wool vest over a dark shirt, black leather trousers, and brown knee-high boots. But on him, they still scream wealth.
"What’s wrong with this?" he asks, genuinely baffled.
"You don’t look like common-folk," Cyrus says, amused.
Lucien’s horse tosses its head beneath him, picking up on its rider’s irritation. "And why, in all seven hells, would I *want* to look like a commoner?"
"Because," I drawl, "people tend to act differently when they know their king is coming. The gamblers, tavern keepers, and brothels put up an honest front. Officials beat the beggars off the streets. Shady merchants suddenly develop consciences for the day. And the people line up with garlands and prayers, hoping for a royal boon. In Silvermoor, we call it eye service. You walk out dressed like that, and word will reach half of Ebonheart before you do that the king is on his way."
The look Lucien gives me could freeze hell solid. "You know far too much about these things."
I shrug. "I used to be a peasant, remember?" My eyes travel up to his silver hair gleaming like starlight, the ink curling down his muscular arms, the ruby on his finger, the so obviously customized boots. Every inch of him screams royalty. I shake my head. "You’d stand out too much if you came along."
Lucien swings off his horse in one fluid motion. And then, without warning, he grips the hem of his shirt and pulls it clean over his head.
"Better?" he asks flatly.
I try to speak, but it comes out in a noiseless garble. The sunlight kisses Lucien’s pale skin and gods--he glistens. Marble-cut muscles flicker, his trim waist tapering into a sinful, mouthwatering V that disappears beneath his pants. It’s unfair. Offensive, even. He is so disgustingly ripped, beautiful, that looking at him is a moment of such exquisite perfection, it physically hurts my soul.
I’d accuse him of showing off, but honestly? Lucien could walk the entire kingdom stark naked and not give a damn. The man has no shame.
"No," Cyrus and I say in unison.
Ten minutes later, I have Lucien wearing the tallest stable boy’s shirt and pants, masking his scent with the smell of horseshit wafting off him. An unremarkable, tattered red hood hangs over his head, hiding his long tresses.
"You’re sure this is necessary?" He asks as I smudge his cheeks lightly with some mud.
"Absolutely," I lie smoothly. "You’re too pretty not to be noticed on sight."
He seems content with that answer, nodding, and keeps silent as I ruin his appearance even more. Partly because I’m still mad at him. Partly because I’ll probably never get a chance to mess with him like this again. Cyrus is doubled over behind us, red-faced with suppressed laughter.
"There," I say, stepping back to admire my work.
Lucien glances down at himself, then over to the stable hand still clutching his discarded garments like they’re relics. "Well? How do I look?"
"Great," I deadpan.
"Perfect," Cyrus adds, grinning.
"U-unrecognizable, si-sire," stable hand stammers.
"Like a fucking wanker," a voice drawls from the stable’s entrance.
I turn to find Evadne leaning against the doorframe, arms folded, that wolfish grin spreading across her face. She winks at me. "Thought I might crash the party. I’ve got a friend to visit in town." Her gaze slides to Cyrus and she wiggles her fingers in a mock greeting before letting her eyes rake over Lucien.
She sniffs, lips curling. "You smell like you’re full of shit."
Lucien doesn’t miss a beat. "And yet here you are, drawn to me like a fly to a carcass."
"Carcass is about right," Evadne says sweetly. "I like this version of you. All humble and peasant-smelling. Maybe we should make it a tradition."
Lucien’s eyes narrow. "You first. I’ll even find the horseshit myself."

"If you’re so desperate to play the gentleman, boy," Lucien interrupts, lazy and cutting all at once, "you can ride with this one." He gestures at Evadne without looking at her. "She’s far better company. Fewer sharp words. Less tendency to bite."


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