Chapter 138: Back Home, Part 1.–2
That a part of me is still there, in that apartment, at that moment.
The house is quiet, everything is in its place… Familiar, acquaintance. And yet… different.
Because I’m different.
We walk into the living room, I sit down. Not because I want to, because I need to. My legs…
They are no longer so firm. Ethan disappears for a second, I hear movement. And then come back with a glass of water.
“Here.”
I receive it. My hands are barely shaking… I drink slowly. The water runs down my throat…
And I feel like something inside me is a little comfortable.
He sits in front of me, not too close, but not far either.
Right in that exact spot… where he’s not intrusive… but he’s there.
“Do you want to talk?”
The question is gentle, careful.
I deny… No, I don’t want to, I can’t. At least not now.
He nods without insisting. And that… I appreciate that more than I can say.
The silence returns, but it does not weigh. Because he’s there, and that’s enough.
My eyes wander over the place; the table, the sofa, that vase, that corner, small details… But familiar.
My chest tightens, not from fear. Of something else, of something deeper, more emotional. More…
intimate.
“Clara…”
I look at him.
“You’re staying here tonight.”
It’s not a question, but it doesn’t sound imposed either.
It’s… careful.
I nod.
Γ
I do not dispute it, I do not question it. Because I don’t want to go back, not tonight. Not after this.
“I’m going to prepare the room,” he adds. “Maybe you want a little space today… So, the guest room will be prepared for you.”
4 Chapter
And for a second… sormething in me reacts
The guest room, the distance, the space. But before I can say anything…
He stops.
He looks at me, and then… change.
“Or-”
He pauses for a while. But important.
“You can stay with me. If you wish. Whatever you ask will be done.”
My breathing barely stops.
“You don’t have to decide now,” he adds quickly. “I just… I want you to feel comfortable.”
I look at him and see something in him.
It is not pressure, it is not hidden intention. It is… Real care, that disarms me. Because my mind… I expected something else.
Defenses, doubts, but no. There is nothing like that… Only him. Just as he is.
Under my gaze, my fingers play with the glass.
“I don’t want to be alone…”
The phrase comes out before I can stop it.
And when it does… I realize.
I need him, I need him around tonight.
He does not hesitate.
“Then you won’t be.”
He gets up, he approaches. He offers me his hand.
“Come on”
I take it, we stand up. We go upstairs.
Every step feels… different, as if I were crossing something. Not physical, internal.
When we entered the room… My chest tightens, but not out of fear. From memory.
Of everything that this place was, and of what it could be again.
Ethan doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t do anything else. Just… Open the closet, pull out a T-shirt.
“You can use this.”
I nod and take it.
“Thank you…
My voice is low, he nods.
“I’m going to be here.”
And he comes out. Giving me space, respecting. And that… That gives me something I didn’t know!
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