The Lost Pack (Paige) novel Chapter 240

**Poppy’s POV **

I don’t sleep, not properly. I lie on my narrow bed in my grease-scented shoebox of an apartment, staring at the ceiling while the takeaway downstairs rattles and clatters like it hates the concept of silence.

Every time I start to drift off, the fog presses closer. A hungry awareness at the edges of my thoughts, like something pacing in the dark, waiting for me to open my eyes.

The warm voice stays with me too, quiet and steady. Like it’s watching, waiting for something and letting me know I’m not alone.

“Tomorrow,” it whispers at some point.

I swallow. “Yeah.”

Somewhere close to four in the morning, I sit up and decide that if I can’t sleep, I might as well do something useful. Which, apparently, is my brain’s polite way of saying spiral with purpose.

I finish packing. It doesn’t take long because I don’t own much. I pause with Paige’s photo in my hands. Her smile is bright, and the sun in her hair makes it shine like copper. Her arm was around me, protecting me even back then.

“I’m coming home,” I whisper to it.

“You’re already almost there. Did you notice that you’ve been making your way back there since you left?” The voice inside me asks.

I ignore it and set the frame down carefully instead of throwing it into the bag like the rest of my things.

“Every time you have moved, you’ve moved closer to them.”

I don’t need to ask who ‘them’ are. I pause, thinking about it. I guess the voice is right. Each time I’ve relocated in the past seven months, I’ve moved towards them, not further away.

“It’s the pull of the mate bond. No matter how much you try to ignore it, it will always lead you back to them, even if you don’t realise it.”

“So you keep saying,” I sigh. “Look, I’ve already said I’m going back, so you can stop going on about it now.”

“But you are going back because you’re scared of what you’ve found here. You’re still trying to outrun your fate.”

I clench my fists and screw my eyes shut, wishing I could run from this damn voice that lives in my head. “Goodness, what do you want from me? If I stay, you’ll complain; if I go back, you’ll complain. I can’t win with you, can I?”

“This is not a game to win or lose. It’s your choice to make, but no matter what you decide, the result will be the same. One way or another, destiny will always catch up.”

That silences me. Is that true? Will any choice I make lead to the same result? Moving to the window, I peer out. It’s still dark, not that there’s much to see from here anyway. My eyes automatically find the moon, so bright and almost full. A peace washes over me, and I press a hand to the glass, as if I could reach out and touch it.

Closing my eyes, I let its glow soothe me the way it always has, and I swear I hear a howl in the distance. Was that real? Or just a reminder of what awaits me tomorrow.

My mind goes back to the moment I almost gave in. I can still feel the heat of Leo’s hands on my hips, his mouth on my neck as he pulled my back flush against his chest possessively. Goosebumps erupt over my skin as the memory of Jake’s fingers unbuttoning my blouse as his mouth explored mine with a gentle reverence.

I’d been so ready for them. To surrender and give them every part of me, until the hunger pressed in and the voice inside me spoke clearly for the first time. I still remember the look on my mates’ faces as I’d freaked out. I’d never told them why, too embarrassed to admit I was hearing voices and feeling a hunger for something that was not my own.

Instead, I’d been a coward and let them think it was the mate bond that scared me. It hadn’t, not until that moment when I found out what mating with them would unlock.

When the sky starts to lighten, I shower, scrubbing my skin until it’s pink, and then pull on the least-wrinkled clothes I own. I stare at myself in the mirror.

My hair is its usual mess of red curls, but my eyes look too bright, my mouth too tight and my skin paler than ever. I look like someone headed to their own execution. Trying to pretend I’m fine, that this is what I want, but it’s not.

“Get it together,” I mutter. “Being dramatic isn’t going to help.”

The warm voice hums with amusement but doesn’t comment.

I sling my bags over my shoulder and leave all the money I have left on the counter. Taking only enough to get back to Cinderwood village. I lock the door behind me, taking one last look at the ugly hallway before turning away. The stench of grease gets stronger as the stairs creak under my feet one last time. I won’t miss this place, not one bit.

The air outside is cold enough to bite. Good, cold helps to keep me from getting lost in my own thoughts.

I post my apartment keys through the letterbox of the takeaway downstairs and send a text message to the owner, thanking him for letting me rent the apartment and explaining there has been an urgent family matter, meaning I need to leave immediately.

As usual, I make it to the coffee shop early, before most of the regulars arrive. The bell chimes softly as I step through the door for my last shift.

My coworker looks up from wiping the counter. “You’re early again.”

“Couldn’t sleep,” I say, which is true.

She tilts her head, taking in the bags. “You going somewhere?”

I hesitate.

Then I paste on a smile that feels like a lie. “Family emergency.”

Her expression softens, just a little. “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.”

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