Mango had relented but Nathaniel felt no joy. This was because he felt the resistance in Mango's heart, but even then she compromised for him.
Mango now was exactly the person like she was five years ago, who was completely devoid of her own opinions and she lived only by Nathaniel's wishes. Once, Nathaniel had enjoyed it and he felt that it was an honor to be loved by a woman like this. However, now that he was in love as well, he realized how powerless and sad it was to lose yourself for someone you love.
Nathaniel stood in front of the bed and he did not move. Mango was surprised.
"What's wrong?"
"Don't worry about me. You can do whatever you want. What I really want is a wife, one who is true to herself and not a person who gives herself up for me. No matter what, I will be right by your side."
Nathaniel's voice was not loud but soft and gravelly. Nevertheless, Mango was very touched.
She suddenly realized that her efforts five years ago might not have been as big of a deal as she thought it was.
At the time, all she did was follow behind Nathaniel. Back then, she looked at Nathaniel and she fantasized about when he would stop to pay attention to her. However, she had never realized that this kind of love was abnormal. Instead, that was a lowly sort of love that meant nothing.
If you wanted someone to fall in love with you, you have to show him your best qualities. Thus, you should not lose yourself completely for him.
Five years ago, Mango was nothing but a puppet. At the time, she had no soul and no thoughts of her own. Everything she did was so that Nathaniel would look at her, even if he looked at her with nothing but pity.
Once upon a time, she was a proud and popular girl. No matter if it was in school or in the Art Faculty, she was highly respected and adored. Flowever, ever since she met Nathaniel and fell in love with him, she had completely lost herself.
In the last eight years, looking back on it now, there seemed to be very few moments that were truly worth remembering"
Instead of actively strengthening herself, improving herself, trying to make herself worthy, and keeping up with Nathaniel, she had been humble and wasting away her time in pursuit of love.
Flow could this version of Mango be worthy of Nathaniel in any way?
Flow could she be an equal to him? Furthermore, was it even justified to say that she was Nathaniel's wife?
Nathaniel was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Thus, he could have any woman he wanted. Flence, was it fair for Nathaniel to deal with the negative consequences just because he loved her?
Of course not! She had no right to ask Nathaniel to stay for her!
Mango felt that God had been merciful to her because Nathaniel could fall in love with her. Whether it was guilt or true love, Mango did not want to think about these useless things. Instead, she knew that being with Nathaniel now was a new chance.
It did not matter how pathetic she had been or what she had missed. Right now, she had a great chance to start over with Nathaniel.
After Mango thought about all of this, she suddenly felt that she used to be so self-absorbed. If she had figured it out earlier, would she and Nathaniel not have been like this today?
Mango felt thankful for the fire incident five years ago that at least kept her from losing Nathaniel. Moreover, she was also grateful to herself that her feelings for Nathaniel remained strong even though five years have passed. Additionally, Mango was most grateful for that disaster because it made her realize what a rare man Nathaniel was. Indeed, he was a man worthy of her lifelong devotion and her companionship.
Mango had never understood her needs as well as she did right now.
She just wanted the man in front of her!
Not only did she want him by her side, but she also wanted his heart, his love, and his entire life!
However, Mango did not want to just receive without giving back. Life was a long and winding path and no one would put in the effort for someone for no reason, even if it was the person they loved the most. Hence, if one wanted to be someone's equal, one had to be strong to pass through trial.
Mango sighed softly, but her gaze slowly became brighter.
Then, she averted her gaze from Nathaniel and she looked at the scenery outside the window. Suddenly, she felt it was wonderful. The sky was a brilliant blue and the sunlight was comfortingly warm.
Why should she refuse such beautiful things?
Mango smiled slightly and it carried a sense of relief.
Nathaniel felt taken aback and he was confused at that.
He had not seen Mango smile in a long time. Ever since Mango had returned, she had been holding herself back and she lived life cautiously.
Then now, she smiled.
The whole world seemed to change for her and it became very colorful.
Soon, the torment and fear in her heart had slowly dissipated.
Nathaniel did not know what Mango had thought through, but the serenity and relief of the moment relaxed him.
He sat down beside Mango and he asked softly, "Do you still need a psychiatrist?"
Mango shook her head and she said, "The psychiatrist can only guide me. If I don't want to confront my fears, there's nothing he can do either. Thank you, Nathaniel."
Nathaniel was a little confused by her sudden gratitude.
Nathaniel thought that perhaps the loss of his child had made him feel guilty. Now that he saw Mango's confident expression again, he felt the same sensations in his heart like he did half a year ago.
Their relationship had taken a lot of detours over the past six months. Nevertheless, their hearts were tightly entwined together now and one glance could make them feel warm down to the core.
Nathaniel held Mango in his arms and he said gently, "Did you know? When I first saw you, you wanted to rule the world and everyone else paled in comparison to you. Back then, I thought that you were brilliant. But then over the next eight years, I never saw you like that again. I even thought that marrying me made you lose all your vitality. But now seeing you like this, I'm sure you can regain yourself, right?"
Mango was surprised and she asked quickly, "Didn't you see me for the first time at the party?" "The first time I saw you was when you won the painting contest."
Nathaniel's words surprised Mango for a long time.
It turned out that he had noticed her earlier than she thought.
Thus, their first encounter was glorious indeed.
Mango smiled widely with satisfaction.
"Thank God it wasn't at the party, if not I'd die of shame."
Nathaniel hugged her gently and he said softly, "If that were the first time, I wouldn't have married you no matter who you were."
"Then what have I been doing for the past eight years?"
"It's all over now, and our future will be bright. Trust me. Our daughter will have a successful surgery and I will find our son. Wisdom will grow up happy as well. Our days together will only get better from now onwards."
Nathaniel did not avoid the topic of Zion's disappearance.
It was not like that Zion would return if he did not talk about it. They were husband and wife, and they would deal with whatever issues that concerned their children together.
Mango somehow felt quite sad upon hearing that.
There was still no heads up about Zion so far. It was not good news for Mango, but she also knew that the most important thing now for her was to cure herself. If she collapsed, then how could she go on for the sake of her child as well as Nathaniel?
After that, Mango sighed and she said, "Do you want to know what happened that made me unable to eat?"
"Don't force yourself if you don't want to tell me. When you change your mind about it, I'll be there for you. Whether you tell me or not, it won't change a thing. I'll be with you and I will protect you. I promise you that my feelings will never change."
Nathaniel's words touched Mango's heart. She took a deep breath and said, "I think it's better if I told you. Maybe it would help me get over the trauma."
Comments
The readers' comments on the novel: The Sweet Rival (Mango Shen and Nathaniel Ye)