HAZEL
I woke to cold sweat drenching my sheets. The room spun, and for a moment I couldn’t remember where I was. Then it all came rushing back.
Baruch.
The syringe.
His words, cutting deeper than any blade.
"Who could ever love you?""
I pressed my palms against my eyes, trying to block out the memory. My body felt wrong. Disconnected. Like someone had replaced my bones with something hollow and unstable.
I had to find him.
I threw the sheets off and tried to stand. My legs buckled immediately. I grabbed the bedpost, fingers digging into the wood as the room tilted. Everything felt loose, like my joints had forgotten how to hold together properly.
The drug... Whatever he’d given me was still working through my system.
I stumbled toward the door, using the wall for support. My hand found the doorknob and I wrenched it open.
"Where are you?" The scream tore out of my throat, raw and jagged. "You monster! Show yourself!"
I lurched forward, aiming for the sentinel quarters. He’d be there. He had to be there.
"Baruch!"
My voice echoed down the hallway. I pushed forward, one hand on the wall, my vision blurring at the edges. The corridor seemed to stretch impossibly long.
There was movement ahead. Though my sight still spun. I could make out people. Sentinels and Omegas stopped what they were doing and turned toward me.
Their faces changed. Eyes went wide and mouths fell open.
Someone even gasped.
The whispering started. Urgent, shocked murmurs that grew louder with each passing second.
"You idiots," I managed. "Where is that bastard? Where is Baruch!!!"
Someone then pointed and something about it caused me to look down.
Oh goddess.
I was naked. Completely naked.
Heat flooded my face, burning from my chest up to my hairline. I tried to cover myself with my hands, but there was too much skin, too much exposure.
"Don’t look," I choked out. "Don’t fucking look at me."
I turned to run back to my room. And that was when my foot caught on nothing. The floor came up fast and I slammed into it, the impact knocking the air from my lungs.
Pain bloomed across my knees and palms.
Something inside me snapped.
I started hitting the floor. My fists connected with the hard surface again and again. The pain felt good. It was at least something real. Better than the hollowness eating away at my insides.
"Why didn’t I just accept the arranged marriage then?" The question burst out of me. I couldn’t hold it back anymore.
Mother gestured to Delta, who disappeared into the adjoining bathroom.
"I don’t even know why now." The words kept coming, faster now, tripping over themselves. "Was it what was said about him? Because they turned out to be just stupid rumors at the end of the day. Did I just hate Fia that much? Did I just hate the fact that it was me that was supposed to given away like fucking properly while she has a mate she got to be small and happy and content with?"
Delta returned with the first aid kit and handed it to my mother.
"I catapulted her to greatness, Mum. Can you even believe that? Why would I do that?" My throat felt tight. "I thought I was making her suffer but everything at the end of the day has bounced back to me. I have her the power she used to fucking ruin me."
Mother opened the kit and pulled out antiseptic.
"You are my mom." I grabbed her wrist with my good hand. "Why didn’t you see how myopic I was? Why didn’t you stop my bad decision?"
She looked at me then. Really looked at me. Her expression was unreadable.
"You have never listened to me anyway." She pulled her wrist free and dabbed antiseptic on my knuckles. The sting made me hiss. "Would you have heard me out if I had refused you?"
I didn’t answer. We both knew the truth.
"If I am frank, the only reason I accepted then was because you are my daughter." She wrapped gauze around my hand with practiced efficiency. "What mother wouldn’t stand beside her daughter?"
The tears came again. I hated them. Hated how weak they made me feel.
But I needed someone to blame. Heck, it wasn’t like she was innocent in all of this. Your children were a reflection of you and mother made me this. She did. So I went off regardless.
"What sort of mother are you?" The accusation felt good leaving my mouth. "Children make bad choices all the time. I did and it was you that was supposed to put me back in line. You made me like this, Mom. You ruined my life."

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