Unmatched Wife: Not His To Claim Anymore novel Chapter 79

Chapter 79

Chapter 79

MATTHEW

The words of her therapist still repepated itself in a loop as I took Theo back to our hotel room, and helped him with his assignments making sure, that he did all the activities that he was told to do. He wasn’t speaking like he used to, all the time, but he was no longer mute, and asked for things. This made me feel relieved, he was getting better, that was all that mattered to

1. me.

That night, after Theo was fed, and he had two stories to which he had fallen asleep, I made my way to the living room and pulled out my laptop and stared at the blank document.

A confession to a dead woman.

Where did I even start?

I had written two lines, starting with I’m sorry I killed you, before deleting it. I took a deep breath and wondered if I was capable of doing this. She was dead, nobody was going to read this except me, it was time that I started being truthful to myself. I owed it to her memory. Taking a deep breath, I started again, allowing the words to just flow from my hands, no matter what it was.

*Dear Bianca,*

*Dr. Martinez wants me to confess everything to you. To write out all my failures without the protective lies I’ve been using to make myself feel better about killing you.*

*So here’s the truth:*

*I never loved you. I married you because you got pregnant after a drunken night with me, when I had mistook you for another woman and I also needed a Luna and you needed pack protection since you were on the run as a rogue wolf, with no family alive waiting for you, and I convinced myself that was enough of a foundation to build something real. But I never actually tried to build anything real. I went through the motions of being your husband while keeping you at arm’s length emotionally because I was still in love with someone else.*

*I compared you to Mia constantly. Every time you weren’t bubbly enough, warm enough, spontaneous enough–I held you up against this fantasy I’d been nursing for years and found you lacking. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right. But I did it anyway, again and again, until you stopped trying to earn my affection and just focused on being the best mother and doctor you could be.*

*Which should have been enough. Should have made me love you. Because you were remarkable at both those things. But it didn’t matter to me because I didn’t see you as a person. I saw you as a role you were supposed to fill, and when you filled it adequately but not perfectly or to the expectations that I wanted it, I resented you for it.*

*I brought Mia into our home knowing it would hurt you. I did that to hurt you, not because she was sick, or dying. I wanted to show you that I was capable of loving someone that wasn’t you. I loved hurting you and demeaning you. Knowing you’d have to watch me shower attention on another woman while barely acknowledging you. I did it anyway because I wanted Mia close, and your feelings about that, if it was right as me doing it, while married to you didn’t matter to me. Your pain didn’t matter as long as I got what I wanted.*

And when you finally stood up to me, finally said no to something I demanded, I used my Alpha authority to override your autonomy. I forced you into a ritual you knew was dangerous, ignored your medical expertise, dismissed your pleas to stop. Because Mia’s life mattered more to me than your safety, your autonomy, your right to refuse to sacrifice yourself for my desires.

I killed you. Not accidentally. Not through unfortunate circumstances. I made a deliberate choice to prioritize Mia’s survival over your autonomy, and when you died, I told myself it was necessary. That you’d chosen to help. That I’d had no other option. But those were lies. All of it was lies designed to protect me from the reality that I murdered my wife to save my mistress.

I don’t know who you were, Bianca. I lived with you for four years and I never bothered to learn your dreams, your tears, what made you laugh when you weren’t just being polite. I reduced you to a function in my life, and when you stopped tulfilling that

Chapter 79

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function, I considered you expendable.

You deserved so much better. You deserved a husband who actually loved you, who saw you as a complete person rather than a role. You deserved to be chosen, to be prioritized, to be valued for who you were instead of what you could provide.

I gave you none of that. And I can never make it right.

All I can do is make sure Theo grows up understanding that what I did to you was wrong. That love requires seeing people, respecting their autonomy, valuing their inner lives. That power should never be used to override someone’s right to refuse.

I’m sorry isn’t enough. It will never be enough. But I need you to know that I see it now. I see what I did to you. And I will carry the weight of that knowledge for the rest of my life.

I destroyed you. And I destroyed our son’s chance to have his mother. And I destroyed my own chance at becoming someone worthy of love.

That’s my confession. That’s the truth I can’t escape anymore.

I killed you. And nothing will ever make that okay.

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