Guinevere had turned into a fierce, forgiveness-forcing, fear-killing freight train aimed directly at Maddox’s self-destruction and she was not slowing down.
Maddox blinked down at her as the information landed in stages.
"Kael’s room was decorated like this. Blair did it," he managed after a moment, realizing Guinevere had been asleep, as in double venomed, when they were in Kael’s quarters and it hadn’t come up in front of her yet.
She grinned. "Oh, I love that."
Maddox watched her grin about interior decorating while sitting in his lap with a bruise on her face and a stab wound in her recent history, and decided the priorities in this conversation needed immediate restructuring.
"You fell on a dagger?" he pressed.
"Oh, that," she said like it was an afterthought. "Technically, the dagger and I arrived at the same location at the same time."
"That’s falling on a dagger."
"It was more of a mutual collision," she stated, describing the self-inflicted stab wound as a mutual collision with the deadpan, damage-deflecting, dignity-preserving delivery of a woman who had started rebranding her disasters and was going to die on that hill.
"Between you and a weapon."
"Correct. I didn’t have great spatial awareness at the time."
"And this is... the abridged version?"
"Significantly."
"And this is the story you’re choosing to tell me right now. While sitting in my lap. With a bruise on your face," Maddox stated, lips twitching.
"Yes," she replied. "Would you prefer the one about the high-speed chase?"
"Are you talking about when you were almost arrested with Shadowfell?"
Her face went red. "Oh, I forgot about that time."
She forgot about being almost arrested. The near-arrest was so low on her list of weekly crises that it had slipped her memory entirely. Maddox’s expression suggested this was not the reassurance she thought it was.
"The Luminari take trespassing very seriously," she explained.
Maddox’s jaw worked once.
"Why did you have a dagger?" he asked, voice steady.
A reasonable question. The most reasonable question in this conversation. And somehow, out of everything she had told him tonight, this was the one that made her mouth stop working.
Guinevere’s mouth opened. The words were right there, lined up, ready to march. They refused to move.
It wasn’t about trust. She trusted Maddox. She had chosen this man’s lap. The problem was that the truth sounded crazy.
"I’ve already used my ’this sounds insane’ card in this conversation," her voice came out softer. Smaller. The voice of a woman who had been doubting her own perception for days.

Brother. The word split in half in her mouth. Underneath it was a grief that was complicated but still there, still real. She swallowed the crack and moved on, and the effort of sealing it cost her every muscle in her throat.
"She was going to stab herself. So I knocked it out of her hand and grabbed it before she could pick it back up."

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