301 Ava: Let Selene Be Known?
All the necessary arrangements keep Vanessa and Kellan busy.
Someone manages to procure some sort of white, wispy dress that Lisa says will make me look like an angel, but I think looks more like something I’d wear on my honeymoon.
Definitely not something I should wear in public.
“Lucas won’t like it, I predict, scowling at how much of my skin shows beneath the sheer fabric. “Hell, I don’t like it.”
Lisa squints. “I can see your bra. I wonder if we can source a sexy one.”
“This isn’t an ad for lingerie. I’m supposed to be presented as Luna, not as the Alpha’s whore.” Yanking off the flimsy excuse for a dress, my lip curls in distaste. “Who brought this over?” Lisa shrugs. “Some woman. I don’t really know the pack well enough to say who
A frown deepens on my face as I ball up the dress and shove it back into the bag it came in. “Well, whoever she is, she’s got terrible taste.”
We still have the small pile of clothes Kellan had scrounged up for me when I first arrived. They’re not fancy, but they’re practical and comfortable. More importantly, they cover my skin. 1 grab a pair of well–worn jeans and a simple t–shirt.
“Are you sure about this?” Lisa asks, poking at the meager selection of clothing. “I mean, it is kind of a big deal, you becoming Luna and all
I shake my head as I pull on the least distressed pair of jeans I can find. “It’s not some grand coronation, Lisa. I don’t need to look like a queen.
“Maybe we should ask one guard to find something else?” Lisa suggests, glancing towards the
door.
“No,” I say firmly, tugging a t–shirt over my head. “This is fine. It’s who I am, and if the pack can’t accept that, then…” I trail off, not wanting to finish that thought. They have to accept it. It isn’t really their choice. I’m their Alpha’s mate.
But what if choosing me as Luna spurs others into an alpha challenge?
What if, in trying to make it better, I make everything worse…?
Stop trying to borrow trouble before it finds you, Selene says, interrupting my doom–spiraling. Lisa, unaware of the thoughts that flashed through my head, just hums as she tosses a shirt back onto the tiny pile of clothes. “Okay. If you’re sure.”
I am sure. The thought of parading around in that gossamer nightmare makes my skin crawl. It’s not just about the dress, really. It’s about what it represents–like I’m a Luna made to breed little alpha puppies.
That’s not who I am.
301 Ava. Let Selone Be Known?
Not who I want to be.
Grimoire’s insistent tugging on our bond leaves me a little off–kilter as I ponder my first speech to my people. It’s usually made through the pack bond, but I’ve never been able to use one- leaving me to fret that my obvious defects will also bring weakness instead of strength to Lucas‘ position.
Just be yourself. You underestimate how much you have to offer.
I groan. “You’re obligated to love me because we’re bonded. You’re a biased observer.”
I don’t have to. I choose to.
Hah.
“Is she yelling at you for worrying again?” Lisa asks from where she’s standing, staring out the
window.
Kellan’s out there somewhere, and as much as she might deny the bond between them, her eyes gravitate to him.
I sigh, grateful for the wardstone of silence in the room. Its presence allows me to voice the fears that have been gnawing at me since this whole Luna business began.
“Lisa, I’m worried. What if trying to become Lucas‘ strength actually backfires instead?”
She turns from the window, her attention peeled off her mate, who’s running around getting the pack ready. “What do you mean?”
Flopping onto the couch, I groan. “I can’t even use the pack bond to give my first speech. That’s, like, the basic of all basics. Everyone knows I don’t have a wolf. It’s going to be a shit–show.” “Ava, come on,” Lisa says, crossing the room to sit beside me. “You’re selling yourself short.” “Am I though? Ultimately, I’m still an outsider. A Blackwood. Their enemy. And even if they’re okay with that, it’s about perception. What if the pack sees me as a liability? What if they think Lucas is weaker for choosing me? I’m trying to avoid him getting challenged, not bring them out of the woodwork”
“Is there any point in worrying about it now? You’ve already decided on this. There’s a mark on your neck–which looks hideous, by the way, and I still think it needs some Bacitracin. But you can’t really go back now, can you?”
You can always introduce me to the pack, Selene says thoughtfully. Now that you’re mated, Alpha Renard isn’t going to want you for himself.
Jerking upright, I stare at Selene, who thumps her tail casually against the floor as she watches.
“That might make you a target, though. You’re still in a husky body, not a wolf one.”
I told you, appearances are deceiving. I can hold my own, Ava.
“What’s going on?” Lisa asks. “What did she say? It sounds important.”
“Selene thinks I should introduce her to the pack. On the one hand, it would greatly diminish my liability as a wolfless defect of a Lama. On the other–it would bring forth so many questions.
But the world has changed.
The situation is different.
Lisa looks thoughtful, surprising me. I would have figured she would be on my side, rejecting the idea outright.
“Do you agree with her?”
“Maybe. I don’t know. I’m not familiar enough with pack politics to have a real opinion, I think
His woll wants me to declare myself, Selene admits.
A sharp knock on the door interrupts the conversation, and Lisa jumps up to open it, probably thinking it’s Kellan.
I’m pleasantly surprised to see Lucas and Vester. And, surprisingly, Dr. Blackwell.
Then, behind all of them, Sister Miriam.
Lucas immediately sits beside me on the couch, linking our hands together and bringing some warmth to my panicked heart.
“Where’s Vanessa?”
Vester looks surprised by my question. “She’s been running around to get an appropriate venue set up for tonight. Do I need to call her here?”
“No, no. Feeling a little uneasy around Vanessa’s mate, I shift uncomfortably on my feet. “It’s okay. I was just surprised she wasn’t here.”
The apartment is crowded with all of us, and Sister Miriam glides toward me, shocking me by leaning over to give a brief hug. It’s almost like an air hug, so nothing too intimate–but affection has never been a part of our relationship before.
She’s establishing your power base, Selene says softly. Everyone will know behind our Luna,
Wouldn’t that be a negative thing? Wolves hate vampires.
Sister Miriam stands
Sister Miriam has a good reputation among the pack. She saved several lives and that of their Alpha as well. Though there are those who will never like her, no one is foolish enough to go up against her directly.
Oh. That sounds promising. Definitely cases some of my worries that I’m about to be Lucas‘ liability tonight.
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