The Alpha Who Saved Me novel Chapter 101

CHAPTER 101

I was refusing to see Declan because I didn't want any reminders of Gavin in the days following his death, and the two of them are similar in the face. I thought it would hurt seeing Declan because I miss Gavin so damn much. I'm always expecting him to walk through the door or wake me up by making love to me or kissing the shit out of me, but there is nothing.

It wasn't until I watched that video that he made for me that I was able to start putting myself back together again. I don't want to disappoint him and he's right, our son needs me to remind him of his daddy, and I need to show him how to be strong. How can I do that if I hide away in my room? That's not being a strong Alpha, and I want to make sure that Gavin's son is the best Alpha that he can be.

And so, I showered for the first time in days, and then I got

dressed in clean clothes. I'm wearing one of Gavin's t-shirts tied at the waist, but it's clean and that's all that matters. I start throwing orders around at border patrol, the warriors, and the pack house staff, not in a mean way, but orders just the same.

It's the time that I actually spend with my son that almost breaks me. Thinking about how he was finally getting used to his daddy, only to have him ripped away from him as his life is just beginning. I'm so glad that Sara ended Daniel, because I wouldn't want to take away someone's mate like that, and I would have. I will always be indebted to her for ending her own mate, and she will always have a spot in this family no matter what. It takes a lot of courage. and strength to be able to kill your own mate, but a mother's love doesn't end when they grow up; it lasts a lifetime.

After spending time with Ash, I lay him down for a nap and then head down to the office to try and catch up on the finances and anything else that Spencer wasn't able to get done in the last few days. I've been in my office for about two hours now when I feel our synced heartbeats just before the knock comes.

Declan brings Holden to try and cheer me up, and I can't believe how much he's grown. Looking at the pup, a weird sense of knowledge about something that I can't put my finger on, comes over me, but then I push it aside as he asks about my son.

Linking Cici, I ask that she bring Ash to my office and then next thing I know, Declan is pulling me into a hug. I freeze, I don't want sympathy when I'm trying to be strong, but then it's like a cloak of some sort drapes itself around me, giving me comfort instead and I wrap my own arms around his waist.

"I'm here, Quinn, I'm always here...just remember that." He states, and I know the words to ring true because that is who Declan is.

There is a heaviness in my chest at his words, but there is also a little bit of healing to them as well. I can't really explain it. Even Tala is calm and collected as Declan holds me, and she hasn't been calm in days. I should feel off by being held by another male so soon after Gavin has passed even if this isn't what that is, but I don't. I feel a familiarity within the hug, and I embrace it.

After a few minutes, I pull away, though, when a thought comes to mind. I glance up at Declan and he doesn't seem to mind that I broke contact, so I address an issue that I've been thinking about for the past hour, "I need your help with the Blue River pack."

He smiles warmly, "Whatever it is, I'm here to help."

I pick up Holden without even thinking about it and take him over to my chair and bounce him on my lap as I continue, "We need to

anoint someone to take over as Alpha until Ash comes of age. Technically it could be passed to Ayden first, but Demi doesn't want anything to do with it, even though it would only be until Ash turns eighteen."

"Well, Ash is the true heir since Gavin was first born and born within fated mates, so his heir would be Alpha over Gavin's sibling." Declan explains, but I already know this.

"Yes, but I think Ayden deserves some acknowledgement as being an Alpha's son." I say as I try detangling Holden's hand from my hair.

Declan chuckles at our predicament, "Well if you ask me, I think the Beta needs to be stripped of his title for standing by and not saying anything about the Alpha's wrong doings. By stripping his title, any heir of his will be stripped also, so it will leave the title open, and I think that as the second son to the Alpha, that title should belong to Ayden, if he wants it."

I nod, agreeing to what he is saying, "I think we should talk to Demi as soon as possible, so we can figure out what to do about the two temporary positions. There is a warrior in the Blue River pack. that Gavin talked about often, as being a good person. I believe his name is Preston. Maybe you can check him out, see what he's about and we can go from there."

"I know Preston, and he is a good male and warrior. I don't know if he will make a good Alpha, but as the temporary Beta position goes, I think he would work well," Declan goes on, "Have you talked to Aunt Sara about any of this? We may not need a temporary Alpha is she decides to take over until Ash is of age."

"That would be ideal, but I don't think she will want to. Maybe you can talk her into it, letting her know that both you and I will be there to help her along the way." I opt for Declan to talk to her

because I know how much she liked me before Gavin and I had become official; I wasn't her favorite person, and even though she would be doing it for both her son and grand pup, I don't think I would be able to persuade her, not like Declan or even Amelia, "Maybe get your mother involved as well." I add as an afterthought.

"I will see what I can do." He replies just as the door opens and Cici comes walking in with Ash, who Declan snatches up right away.

Watching him with Ash warms my heart and I know that Gavin would agree with me when I say that Declan will be a great role model for our son. A breeze comes through the window just as I think this, and I smile as it caresses my skin, making me think of my mate. Maybe he is with me, I think as I turn to the window and smile, 'I love you, Gavin,' I think to myself and another breeze comes through, this time with a touch of warmth to it, and I now know that he is with me.