The Female Alpha’s Sanctuary novel Chapter 5

Chapter 5
Mother and father both had grim, serious faces as they stared at me with… contempt?
Finally, Landon lifted his gaze from Hestia and looked at me. I could see his jaw twitch, muscles taut as his grip on Hestia’s hand tightened.
The tighter he held onto her, the tighter my chest felt.
“This isn’t going to work.”
He said suddenly.
So softly but the sting it accompanied felt like I was slapped.
The world was slowly falling away from me but I kept my eyes trained on him. I didn’t dare look away even with the impending pain puncturing through my chest. I felt myself swallow, as I breathed in shakily. The tears that were once again building up, glazing over my eyes.
“I won’t accept you, Selene.”
He said. Much stronger and full of conviction this time.
“I never will.”
I stared at him. His words played in my mind like a broken record. Each letter, each syllabie from his lips pierced deep within my heart and left a segment of his apparent distaste for me haunting my thoughts. I could hardly breathe. The invisible weight on my chest pressing harder and harder made swallowing down my sorrow that much more difficult. My eyes flittered around me wildly only to fall back to Landon when I realized there’d be no one on my side.
I was left to fend for myself.
The silence was unbearably thick. The shock momentarily distracted me from my parents’ blank faces. Even when I felt like the world was ending, I couldn’t help but feel surprised from their reaction– or rather, lack of. They were indifferent to the fact their daughter was being rejected. Most parents, if not all, would be angry at the idea of their pup being denied. Denied by none other than their other half. Seeing as my father was Beta, his reaction would’ve been much more aggressive. With higher ranking came with a much stronger sense of protection over family. Looking at him now, I couldn’t sense the tiniest bit of anger radiate from him. Instead he looked somewhat relieved that my mate chose my sister. Like I was some deadweight that would’ve worn Landon down.
The pain I felt magnified.
It felt like I was tied down to a boulder slowly fall further and further into the darkness of the ocean. None of them doing a thing but watch as I sink from the shore. No hands outstretched in an attempt to save me. No glance of guilt spared my way.
This isn’t going to work.
I won’t accept you, Selene.
I never will.
I shook my head at the words taunting me. He couldn’t have meant it. No wolf could ever say such words to their mate. To confirm my suspicion, I looked to him with hope that he was lying. Hope to see that he was only putting up a front. If I were to see any hesitation in his eyes, I would’ve been happy. I would’ve been content with the smallest form of care. My heart, already battered and out in the open, was stepped on and crushed when Landon looked at me with such pity. His dark eyes swirling with emotion he didn’t voice out.
He felt bad for me.
He didn’t care.
He felt sorry for being my mate.
It could’ve been anyone and he would’ve done the same thing
I tried to tell myself that. Tried to lift my mood by convincing myself that the reason he was rejecting me wasn’t because of who I was, but because of who he was and what he wanted. But that somehow made it all the more painful. Although he made up his mind even before finding his mate, I expected him to at least consider it. He didn’t.
There was no part of him that wanted to give me a chance.
He never intended to change his mind no matter who his mate turned out to be.
He just felt sorry it had to be me whose heart he breaks.
Bu-But Landon, I-I’m your mate! The Moon Goddess put us together for a reason. You can’t do this. Please Landon, please
I pleaded. I took a step forward to reach out to him. The tears rolling down my face blurred my vision but I could still make him out perfectly. His tousled hair messy from the amount of times he must’ve ran his fingers through them. He had the habit of playing with his hair when he was frustrated or stuck on what to do. I barely managed to grab hold of his arm but he quickly pulled away as if my touch burned him. His fist clenched as he stared at me. Those beautiful eyes flashed with disgust. He stepped back. Landon’s stance postured in a way to protect Hestia, who stood behind him wordlessly. Her eyes glued to the floor but her hand holding onto Landon’s sleeve trembled.
“Selene, stop it. You’re embarrassing yourself Out of consideration for Hestia, I will overlook your display of disrespect
I stared at him in disbelief. Even when I was being rejected, he didn’t put me first. He didn’t parish me for my disrespect purely out of consideration for her. Not for me. Not because he felt for me but because he felt obligated to for the woman beside him. Because he didn’t want to hurt Hestia by laying a hand on her sister.