The Stained Omega by Elle T Jefferson novel Chapter 44

A Luna’s Dilema. 

(Anna) 

I’m standing in front of the mirror in Momma Beth’s bedroom, my dress is white and drapes around my bump in a beautiful way. Lace is cascading down my shoulders and the fine buttons in the back are holding the dress all together. My hair has been lightly curled and teased to fall down my back in a seductive manner, my lips have a slight hint of cherry hue but otherwise my face is bare. My eyes are blazing blue and wide in both surprise and shock, as I stand here ready to be properly announced as Luna to the Swiftmane pack I can’t help but think of how far I’ve come in my life. And how I feel like I haven’t moved at all. 

The nightmares of my father have become a thing of the past since I started sleeping in Fraction’s arms. My nights are filled with new horrors now, I have nightmares of John and how he tormented me, of how Eve held me down as I was raped by the only family I have ever known. Nightmares of a woman I don’t know being snatched from her family and being forced to carry a child that would become me, attack me in my sleep. 

When I wake, my days are filled with such joy I feel I can barely contain it, anything and everything I need is taken care of. I simply mentioned a giant bean bag and the next day not one but two arrived at the packhouse. When I wanted to use my mouth on Fraction, he was patient and allowed me the time to explore and truly appreciate my first time doing it. Then the pain starts again. I can see he wants to touch me, to return the pleasure I gave him, my b*dy and mind just won’t allow it. At night when we curl up to sleep in my little nest, I can feel him nestled between my butt cheeks and all I want to do is push him off me. I have to swallow down my revolution for the only man I 

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have or ever will love. 

In some ways I feel healed, in others I feel I have just created a new cave to hide in. Traded one fear for another, instead of flinching from my father’s hands, I flinch from my own memory. I’m sleeping during the day because my nights are filled with me gazing at the ceiling and wishing Fraction would move and pull me closer all at the same time. 

“Anna we are about ready for you,” Momma Beth comes into the room, “Anna what on Earth is wrong? Why are you crying?” She rushes over to me as I turn to her. 

“I can’t do this Momma Beth.” I cry crumbling to the floor; she gets down with me and cradles me in her arms. 

“Oh Anna, why ever not?” She says while stroking my hair. 

“I love him so much; I feel like my heart will burst with it. I can’t be the Luna he needs though.” I whisper my confession into her chest. 

“You are exactly who he needs, you are already his Luna. This just makes it official.” She continues to stroke my hair and whisper words into my ear. “After everything you have gone through you are allowed. to have doubts and worries, we can work through them together as a family. As for a future Luna, well dear, you have been his Luna since. you entered this house. He has loved you for long before he knew it himself.” I sit up, swiping at my eyes. 

“Momma Beth, you don’t understand.” I sniff and I’m kind of grossed at the amount of snot and tears that are happening. Momma Beth hands. me a tissue. 

“I think I understand perfectly. When you are ready, when your b*dy and mind are both working as one, you will be able to have him touch you again.” I just look at her, how could she possibly know? “I knew a woman long ago who was hurt in the worst way a woman can be hurt, 

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she thought the world would crumble around her if she moved. She thought no man would ever see her as beautiful because of the scars. she carried on her back. She fell into a fit of depression so bad that she tried to kill herself.” I gasp and put my hand over my mouth. 

“What happened?” I ask in a small whisper. 

“She met her mate. It was a rocky start, for the longest time she wouldn’t let her mate touch her, so instead they talked and spent their days together. They bonded in a way that allowed them to connect out of the bedroom. Eventually she was healed to the point she was able to carry their child.” She smiles softly. “Time is an amazing healer Anna, there is no amount of time that can be put on it but eventually one day you will wake up with a clear mind and fresh eyes. And Fraction, will help you get there. Put your trust in him.” She slowly stands and holds her hand out to me, “we are family now Anna. You never have to do anything alone again.” I grasp her hand and stand from the floor. “Now let’s wipe those tears and get you down to my son.” 

When Momma Beth turns to get the tissues on the table beside her mirror, I notice two scars going down her back. I can’t tell how far they go as her dress stops about three quarters of the way up her back. It’s right then I realise if a woman like Momma Beth can push through the pain and become the woman she is today, then I can too. 

“I love you, Momma.” I say as she wipes my eyes. 

With a soft smile she says, “and I love you.” 

Arm in arm we walk out of the room and down the stairs to meet the pack as the new Swiftmane Luna. 

(Fraction) 

I’m standing at the bottom of the stairs awaiting Anna, outside in the yard is the whole pack. Every man, woman and pup has shown up. I 

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couldn’t have asked for a better reception. Even Rick showed up and somehow managed to get Eliza to come too, she hasn’t spoken to anyone, and I don’t expect her to. The fact that she’s here at all speaks volumes for how she feels about Anna. 

When I hear the patter of feet on the stairs I turn and see Anna arm in arm with my mother, she looks stunning. She’s draped head to toe in white lace, her hair is free of its bun and her lips look absolutely k*ssable. Her eyes are red, and she looks like she’s been crying, I flick my eyes to my mother who gives me a small nod to let me know all is 

well.