The child was the only reason why we were still a family.
I could not let him go and make myself stay for the sake of the child. He did not like me. He was only letting me stay and taking care of me because of the child. That was it!
The more I thought about it, the more upset I felt.
It was already dark outside. I was exhausted after a long day. I told Miss Woods about it before getting up t o go upstairs and lying down.
As I lay on the bed, I tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. I had been sharing a small bed with Cecilia the last few days and the abrupt change of location made my heart empty since she was no longer around.
The wind was billowing outside the window, followed by a heavy downpour.
Unable to sleep, I looked at the time. It was midnight. I got up and stood at the balcony, looking out at the strong winds and heavy rain outside the window. I had a sudden urge to rush out and be in the rain.
However, the balcony had been sealed off after what had happened last time. Where I was at the moment, there was no rain and the wind could not blow in
either.
I was in an irritable mood. It felt suffocating.
Without thinking too much about it, and before I suffocated to death, I rushed downstairs without wearing my shoes and rushed into the pouring rain.
The rain slapped my face and body, though it was slightly cold. I had never felt so comfortable and relaxed. I could not help but open up my arms and raise my head to welcome the rain.
At that moment, I no longer felt uncomfortable and irritable. I was even slightly excited.
Soon, I was soaked. I crouched on the ground, the excitement in me slowly dissipating as disappointment and sadness overflowed from me. I had bottled up my feelings for too long and needed to vent it out.
From tearing up in silence to wailing out loud, I could no longer hold myself back and cried my heart out.
The grievances, sadness, and hurt during this period o f time were all released at once at this moment.
Perhaps I was too loud that Miss Woods awoke with a start.
She opened the door and saw me crouching down in the rain. She instantly became flustered and rushed out into the rain to pull me back. I was crying heart-wrenchingly. I did not budge even after she pulled me.
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