Accidental Surrogate for Alpha novel Chapter 63

Ella

“How are you feeling?” Sinclair asks, standing in the doorway of my bedroom. The wild hunt is tonight, and I know he’s not merely asking about my morning sickness or fatigue.

“Nervous.” I confess. “Do you think…” I trail off, blushing and unsure if I can actually speak the question I need to ask.

“What is it Ella?” He inquires, coming forward with an encouraging smile.

“Do you think I could see your wolf before we go tonight, just so that I’ll recognize it when I see you?” I whisper, barely loud enough to hear myself, but knowing Sinclair’s wolf ears will be more than capable of picking up on the sound. And so I won’t be scared. I add silently in my head.

“Of course.” He chuckles, “That’s a great idea. I should have thought of it myself.”

His powerful hands move to the buttons on his shirt, and I find myself taking a step back. “What are you doing?”

“You wanted to see my wolf, I don’t want to ruin this shirt.” He shrugs. “It’s one of my favorites.”

“Right.” I breathe, “Right, of course.”

He continues stripping off his clothes, and I work hard to avert my gaze. So far I’ve been very successful in avoiding temptation by not looking at his body in these vulnerable moments, and I’m not about to change that now – on the day when it’s more important than ever that we practice self control.

“Does it hurt, shifting?” I ask, staring at my fidgeting fingers.

“It does the first time.” Sinclair shares, “The first time is almost unbearable, it takes hours and hours, but once you’ve gotten it over with it happens fast as lightning, too quickly for you to feel the pain of your bones breaking and rearranging.”

“That sounds ghastly.” I feel suddenly lightheaded, “How old are you when you shift the first time?”

“It’s a little different for everyone - most make the change when they go through puberty.” Sinclair informs me, pulling off his trousers.

Already I’m thinking of my baby – my son – eventually suffering through this sort of grisly shift, and I don’t like it one bit. “What was yours like, was anyone with you?” I squeak.

“Mine was as painful as anyone else’s. But my father was with me, he got me through it, just like I’ll do for our son.” He states, a promise in his voice.

“Good.” I sigh, feeling relieved to know Sinclair will help guide our child through the process. I can imagine Henry was a very gentle and supportive presence for Sinclair, and I know he’ll be the same. “I suppose… I probably wouldn’t be allowed to help?”

Sinclair offers me a tender smile. “No sweet Ella. I’m afraid it would be much too dangerous.” He comes forward, taking my face in his oversized hands. This is probably the first time he’s ever been unclothed when I’m not, and I’m amazed at how much stronger I feel with my own body covered. I never realized until now how vulnerable it is to be undressed and exposed when others are not, but Sinclair doesn’t seem to mind one bit. He’s still wielding the power in this room, and part of me resents his constant strength. “Now, do you want to talk, or do you want to meet my wolf?”

“Yes, sorry.” I flush.

“Don’t apologize.” He murmurs, “and don’t get close to me until after I’ve shifted, you don’t want to be within reach of my claws when I make the transformation.”

I nod wordlessly, my pulse pounding in anticipation. Sinclair backs away from me, holding my gaze the same way he did last night at the stone circle. I keep my eyes on him, watching with horrified fascination as he ensures he’s not near anything breakable, then disappears. There’s a loud crack and the air seems to go blurry, I even feel a bit nauseous trying to keep track of the rapid movement. However when my eyes adjust and I’m able to take in the familiar room again, I see that where Sinclair was standing a moment before, now there is only a huge, black wolf with glowing green eyes.