Lost Me, Gained Regret (Jane and Bryant Ferguson) novel Chapter 51

The air felt as if it had solidified, and my heart dangled in suspense.

I was still hoping, foolishly, for him to say something, anything, that might make sense of it all.

After a tense moment, the only thing that came my way was a cold, hard question, "You're in such a hurry to get a divorce?"

The weight of my emotions was suffocating, making it hard to breathe. I looked up at the glaring light in the living room, blinked away the tears, and despite the turmoil inside, my words came out cruel.

"Can’t wait."

I needed it to be over before the pregnancy became obvious.

Betting with my child's future on the line was a risk I couldn't afford.

Behind me, Bryant said nothing more. His answer was the sharp sound of the door closing.

I felt as if all my strength had been drained as I slid down against the shoe cabinet, staring blankly at the ceiling.

My heart felt empty, a dull ache spreading uncontrollably through it.

That night, unusually, I wasn't plagued by sickness and lay awake, tossing and turning.

The autumn wind howled all night, as if trying to penetrate my very being, leaving me soaked with a chill.

I guess I could accept that he didn't love me, and even that he married me because of his grandfather's arrangements.

But what I couldn't accept was that my cherished three-year marriage was nothing but a reluctant sacrifice he made for someone else.

How foolish I was, filled with joy, thinking I had landed myself a true gem.

...

The next day, I was barely awake when Christine called, asking how my foot was and if I needed to take a day off.

I got out of bed to test it, feeling mostly fine.

Although not completely back to normal, it wasn't really affecting my walking.