Love Aint Always Pretty novel Chapter 15

Attrazione

Translation: attraction

Origin: Italian

15

Anywhere I sit, I'll feel him.

He's everywhere.

I think that is how the human brain thinks when a person develops an attraction towards someone. Yes, I am or either I am denying the fact that I'm quite attracted to him.

Just quite.

I mean he can be kind of sweet for a second then completely cold the next hour and that makes him actually quite mysteriously intimidating. Most of the times it somewhat makes me wonder what's on his mind if he hears my name being mentioned, or when I'm around him or if I'm somewhere near him.

I can quickly tell if a guy is attracted to me and it's really easy to distinguish. But when it comes to Nick, he definitely does not belong into that category at all. Which is why I'm trying so hard to do the best that I can to find out a reason on how on earth will I be able to stop whatever this thing that I feel every single time I'm around him or he's near me cos he will never notice me.

Nick turns on the radio, and Tracy was already lying her seat back with her feet up on the dash. But my mind can't stop thinking about how awkward it's going to be if Tracy's gonna to sleep the entire drive. I think he's still mad at me.

I glance at Nick, and he's busy adjusting his rearview mirror while his eyes briefly meets mine. "You're comfortable back there?" he asks.

"Yep." I say.

He turns on the engine and looks straight ahead to the road, while I look back down at my lap where my fingers were resting.

Probably thirty or forty minutes pass, the movement of the car is making my head hurt again and Tracy was already sleeping on her seat. I wanted to ask Nick where we were going but then I remembered he doesn't like questions so I just shut it up. I also wanted to make a conversation with him so I won't at least get bored, but I just don't know if he even wants to talk after the conversation we had a while ago.

So I just slowly readjusted myself in the backseat, massaging my temples as I lean my head back while propping my feet up on the console between Nick and Tracy. He glances at me in the rearview mirror cos of my movement and he holds his stare at me for no longer than three seconds, then looks back at the road. We've both been quiet and no one has been starting to talk. Well we don't have anything to talk about anyways so it's better if we just be quiet.

I have no idea what's going through his head right now and I hate it. I hate it cos I can't read him. I don't know if he's mad at me for what I asked, though I wanna know what I did wrong that made him look at me like I did something terribly terminal. I don't even know if he still wants to talk to me too. I don't know why he always change his attitude towards me right away. I'm so curious about Catherine as well cos their past is so mysterious to me.

But the thing that I really really dislike about Nick is that he never smiles more than five times a week. I don't think that's even normal. I think Nick Wilde is abnormal.

A person who never smiles isn't normal right?

He never laughs as much too. He's so stoic and solidly hard as stone. Plus, he doesn't flirt.

God what's wrong with him? I thought.

It's like his face keeps a strong metallic armor between his impassive expression, around his cold heart and extends to the rest of us.

I really want to know so bad all the thoughts that pass through Nick's head behind that unwavering, stoic and blank expression on him.

I hate it.

I really really hate it.

Well, I'll be honest but I've always been a total sucker for the quiet types. Not the weirdo ones but you know the intelligent, gentleman and the man of a few words kind. I find it intimidating when a man is mysterious, since most guys I know talks too much, and it's annoying sometimes. Quiet types are sexy, for me. Intensely mysterious too.

But Nick is worst than a quiet person. If there's a word quieter than quiet then I think that's him. That's Nick. But no matter how I try to hate him, he's still sexy as hell and it's frustrating me most of the times.

I was still staring at him in the rearview mirror though. I don't know why I was doing it. Maybe I was trying to figure him out. I know it's weird but I just want to read his expression even though it's just the same.

Funny thing is, when he glances at me I quickly look down at my fingers. I feel a little embarrassed when he catches me staring at him. And this is so childish. But that mirror feels like it has tons of magnets in it cos my eyes just keeps on shooting back up to look at him.

I gaze outside my window. Just one more look. One more look. I thought to myself.

The second I look back into the mirror again, so does he.

I look back down again.

Shit.

Why does he always catches my glances at him? It's hard for me not to look longer cos I still feel bad for asking about Catherine and his expression is just hard as rock.

This drive is probably going to be the longest drive of my entire life. Well maybe cos Nick is here that's why I'm thinking it's long and my subconscious mind keeps on telling me that Nick and I being in a place with small space is terribly the most dreadful thing ever.

Why dreadful?

Cos I'm so conscious about my every actions done when he's here and my mind reading ability on Nick is bugging me every single time he looks at me briefly. God I wish I was a psychic.

So I make it four minutes before I look at him. I pulled out my phone and kept gazing at it to check if it's already four minutes, then I slowly look again.

Damn it.

So does he.

I quickly looked out of my window and wasn't able to hold it in. I smiled. I smiled cos this was just too cute. And I'm a little amused by whatever game this is that we're playing right now. It was stupidly cute. I glance at him...

He smiles, too.

Oh god.

He.

Just.

Freaking.

Smiled.