That day had been bad.
I didn’t feel like going downstairs. The weight of everything that happened...Luca, Asher, Alan my guilt, my silence, sat too heavily on my shoulders. And I guess Maria knew I wanted to be by myself, because Leon didn’t come up to bother me. Not even once.
I stayed there, curled up in the room, until dinner time came. And I knew I had to go downstairs. Not for me. For my son. I didn’t want him to notice anything was wrong. I didn’t want him to sense that anything had changed. Because kids, they feel everything. Even when you smile.
So I went downstairs. We had dinner together. We talked about his cartoons and what his action figures were arguing about that day. I laughed when I had to. Smiled when I didn’t want to. Because for him, I could fake sunshine.
Later, I bathed him, tucked him into bed, and grabbed his favourite Toy Story book from the nightstand. It was routine. Familiar. Safe. I had barely read three pages when he said it....out of nowhere, with that sweet little voice that could crack my ribs.
“I love Uncle Luca.”
I paused. Just for a second. Then I smiled tightly. Right now, my feelings for Luca were... I couldn’t explain them. Hate? Not really. A mess of fury, fear, and something colder underneath.
But Leon continued, all bright-eyed and excited.
“He told me when he comes back, he’s gonna bring me A PlayStation. So we can play together,” he said proudly. “He said he’s gonna teach me how to play!”
He grinned at me like it was the best thing in the world.
“I can’t wait for him to come back,” he added, twisting the blanket between his fingers. “He said he doesn’t know when, but… when do you think he’ll come back? Do you think he’ll come for my birthday?”
His eyes sparkled with hope. With innocence. And right then, I hated Luca all over again. Not just for what he’d done to me. But for this. For planting promises in my son’s heart that he couldn’t keep.
I didn’t want to break Leon’s heart. Even though I knew Luca wouldn’t be here for his birthday. I forced the gentlest smile I could find.
“Uncle Luca is very busy, honey,” I told him softly. “But you’re going to have a party with your friends, and that’s cool, right? It’s going to be amazing. And I’m sure he’ll call and talk to you.”
“He’ll really call me?” Leon asked, wide-eyed.
I bit my lip. Why did I say that? But I just nodded, holding the lie like a bandage over a wound I couldn’t fix.
“Yeah,” I said. “Yeah, he’ll call. He’ll wish you a happy birthday. And he’ll probably send you a gift.”
And as I said it, I already knew, I’d be the one to buy that gift. I’d be the one to wrap it, sign it, and make it look like it came from “Uncle Luca.”
Yeah. I was being that mom now.


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