Chapter 25
I had no idea what that was. I had no idea what just happened.
But I knew of one thing… Today was just a taste of what my future was going to look like.
In the morning, I realized that Asher had left some marks on my neck, so I had to apply makeup so Leon wouldn’t notice.
True to his words, Maria told me that they had already they had already found tutors. So by next week, Leon could begin getting home-schooled at the library with his new tutors.
It seemed like a good thing even though it wasn’t what I wanted for my son I wanted Leon to go to school, make friends, interact with other kids, play with other kids, and have friends.
But if Asher was keeping me locked up in here and having Leon being homeschooled by tutors, it just meant that we were going to be prisoners probably for the rest of our lives, never to make any connections with anybody.
And for me, I think it was okay.
But for my son? I needed him to grow up happy, have friends, and make connections.
If our only world was inside this house, that was not a future I wanted for my son. For now, I had no options, but I knew I had to find a way for Leon and me to get out of here.
We had to leave.
I knew it couldn’t be now. It wouldn’t be so soon because Asher would be expecting it. But I had to find a way to take us out of this prison.
For reasons I couldn’t tell or understand myself, that night I expected Asher to come back. And I know it’s stupid, utterly foolish, and I shouldn’t have done it. But in anticipation of his arrival, I got Leon ready for bed early, rushing through our usual routine, eager to get myself ready for bed.
I took a conspicuous amount of time in the bathroom, in front of the mirror, a nervous energy buzzing within me. Shaving everything, making sure I was smooth, every inch of skin polished and soft. I had washed everywhere, scrubbing until my skin glowed, I was smelling good, a subtle, alluring scent.
I wore that amazing silky nightgown that I shouldn’t have bought in the first place, the fabric a cool caress against my skin. I even applied makeup as I went to bed, a touch of colour to my cheeks, and a subtle shimmer to my eyes. Crazy, I know. I even made my hair as I went to bed, carefully arranging the strands, and making sure I had sprayed on some perfume. Don’t judge me.
I know you want to, but don’t judge me.
Apart from the two times I had had sex with Asher, those fleeting, intense encounters, I didn’t know what sex was like, what intimacy truly meant. I didn’t know what a sexual relationship was like. Based on things I had read from the novels and online, those romanticized stories… I don’t know, I wanted to feel good, just This once.
I wanted to feel like a woman, desired and cherished. I wanted to feel alive again, to shake off the numbness that had settled over me. So you know what? Judge me all you want.
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Chapter 25
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So I waited and I waited, the silence of the house my only company until I must have fallen asleep, exhaustion finally claiming me, because Asher didn’t come that night.
Or the next one when I got ready for him, the routine repeated itself, where I stupidly got ready for him. Or the next one, the hope dying with each passing hour.
Five days in, I stopped waiting for him, the anticipation replaced by disappointment. And that’s the day when he actually decided to grace me with a visit. To come and see me in this prison of his making.
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