I Swear I Still Hate Him (Atlas Lawson) novel Chapter 93

Chapter 93

Emery’s POV

The car ride to Laila’s place had been full of laughter, throwback songs, and ice cream-fueled nonsense. We’d talked about everything our professors, random high school memories, the time she fell face-first into a punch howl at prom (iconic). and of course… Atlas.

But it was when we pulled into her driveway that the vibe shifted.

She leaned her head back against the seat and sighed, a dreamy grin on her face. “I still can’t believe your dad’s getting married. Wild. And I guess that means after the wedding, you and Atlas will stop… you know.” She wiggled her brows. “Playing Romeo and Juliet with extra spice.”

I didn’t laugh..didn’t even smirk. I just… sat there. Frozen. Like someone had hit pause on my brain.

Laila turned to me, brow furrowing. “Wait…don’t you have plans of stopping after your parents get married?”

“Um…well..I… My throat dried up.

“Em… Look, you know I love you,” Her voice dropped, soft and serious, as she scooted closer, eyes searching mine. “And I meant what I said earlier. It’s Emerald against the whole damn world, always has, always will. But…This whole thing with Atlas…it’s just some infatuation…right?”

The word infatuation hit harder than it should have.

I swallowed, staring at my hands on the wheel, knuckles white.

“Do you….” she hesitated, her tone laced with concern, “…do you love him?”

I snapped my head toward her. “No. Of course not!” I laughed…awkward, too loud. “It’s not like that. It’s just… you keep a guy and a girl in the same space, things happen, right? It’s basic biology. Cabin fever. Hormones. That’s all it is.”

God, I sounded like I was reading off a badly written pamphlet on ‘how to lie to your best friend.

“I don’t love Atlas.”

But why did the words feel so… fake? Why was my heart pounding like I’d just sprinted five laps?

Laila stared at me for a beat, then her face softened. “Phew.” She exhaled dramatically, fanning herself. “You had your girl sweating in her butt cheeks.”

That earned a chuckle from me. Sort of.

It didn’t reach my eyes.

She hugged me tight before hopping out. “Night, bestie.”

“Night, Laila.” I smiled, watching her bounce into her house.

But even after the door shut behind her, I didn’t move.

Her words echoed. Do you love him?

E

I drove home in silence, headlights carving through the darkness, heart pounding like it was trying to speak a language 1

didn’t want to understand.

When I finally pulled into the garage and stepped out, I froze.

Atlas was there.

Standing just outside the door, hands tucked into his jacket, holding another in one arm. His nose was a little pink from the cold, his hair tousled like he’d been waiting for a while,

“Hey, beautiful,” he said, voice low and warm like a familiar song… I had made my favourite.

I blinked. “Don’t tell me you were actually waiting for me?” I teased, trying to keep it light.

But he smiled…that smile, and said, “I was.”

And just like that, my heart went full gymnast again. Triple flips. No safety mat. He stepped forward, wordless, and draped the jacket over my shoulders like it was nothing. Like he didn’t even realize how intimate that felt.

“Come on,” he murmured. “Let’s get you inside. Everyone’s already in bed.”

We walked in together. No words. Just this stupid, loud silence that only existed in my chest.

Do you love him?

No.

No, I don’t.

I…

I-

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