Just Before My Wedding: Trapped By My Ruthless Boss novel Chapter 110

Chapter 110

KISAREL

We lay on the floor with his arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me back into him like he expected me to vanish if he loosened his grip for even a second.

I attempted to sit up, but he tightened his grip.

“Stay.”

“I can’t. I need to go home.” I replied.

“This is your home.” He said with his eyes still closed. His voice was soft and almost sleepy, like he had been holding onto me for so long that letting go had become physically impossible.

My chest gave a small, painful pull.

“Oceans…”

“Mhm?”

“Jace will…”

“Enough of Jace.” His voice was low, but the firmness in it made me flinch a little. “Can we just have a moment without talking about him?” He opened his eyes and looked at me. “One moment where I’m not hearing his name in your mouth while you’re still dripping with my cum?”

I looked away first.

He let out a slow breath and pressed his forehead against my shoulder.

“I just want you here with me,” he said, his voice was calm and smooth again. “Just me and you. I know that sounds selfish.”

I lay back down, wondering why Jace hadn’t called to know where I’d gone. I was certain it was already past midnight.

His fingers moved into my hair slowly, threading through the strands near my temple.

“Kiss…” He called, and I hummed a response. “I am sorry.” He paused, like he was tasting the words to see if they bruised his ego.

My eyes snapped open.

“I’m sorry for how things turned out,” he continued. “For how I shut you out. For making you feel like you were only important when I needed you in my bed.”

He shifted onto his side, propping his head on his hand, looking down at me.

I stared at the dark shape of the coffee table across the room.

“You did make me feel that way.” I whispered.

“I know.”

“No, I don’t think you do.” I tried to sit up again, and this time he let me.

The loss of his arm around me felt too empty.

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Chapter 110

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I sat with my back against the edge of the sofa. Oceans sat up across from me, one knee bent, his forearm resting loosely on it.

He looked nothing like the man who made the corporate world tremble. His hair was messy, his chest bare, and his mouth swollen from mine.

And still, he looked dangerous.

“You hurt me.” I said.

His eyes didn’t move from my face. “I know.”

“Look. I know what we have can never see the light of day. I can never be the woman you can openly care for…” I swallowed and repaired the damage quickly, before he could take more from that sentence than I was ready to give. “Not that I want to be that woman… But treating me that way? That was totally unfair. It’s unfair how you always choose silence, rather than talk about things.”

His jaw worked. “Sometimes I choose silence, because that’s the only way I know how to protect things. You. My obligations. The mess around me. But the truth is, silence was easier than looking at you and admitting I didn’t know how to keep you without destroying everything around us.”

I sat still, processing his words.

“Oceans-”

“I am tied to Moon in ways you don’t understand.”

“I understand enough. She’s your fiancée.”

“It goes beyond business.”

That got my attention. My gaze shifted to his face.

His expression closed a little, almost as if he had reached a door he refused to open.

“I can’t explain all of it right now,” he said.

“Of course you can’t.”

“That’s not important right now.” He inched closer, “What’s more important is making you understand what you mean to me, and how much you’ve eaten deep into my soul.”

God. His voice. So deep and controlled, yet so vulnerable. And the hurt and honesty in it made everything worse.

I didn’t want him this vulnerable.

I wanted him to fight me. To command me. To say something cruel so I could hate him properly. But he just sat there, looking at me like he wanted me to see right through his defenseless soul without any intention of shielding himself.

“I tried with her the other night,” he said, and I didn’t need him to finish his statement to understand what he meant.

“With Moon?” I asked, despite myself.

His eyes stayed on mine. “Yes.”

A hot, ugly feeling moved through my chest.

Acute jealousy,

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Chapter 110

Pain.

Disgust.

All of it tangled together so tightly I couldn’t separate one from the other.

He looked away then, and it was the first time he seemed almost ashamed.

“I couldn’t.”

He dragged a hand over his mouth and let out a humorless breath.

“I kissed her. I touched her. I did everything I was supposed to do.” He shook his head. “I couldn’t get hard, Kiss. Not even close. She had her hand on me, and my body might as well have been dead.”

A sick, shameful part of me warmed at that.

Another part of me hated him for givino.

that had to do with my boss.

me something that felt like hope when I had no right to even hope for anything

“My body only responds to you.” His voice dropped. “My heart. My body. Every part of me that still knows how to want something–it all belongs to you. And I can’t fucking change that, no matter how hard I try.”

I swallowed. “Oceans-”

“I’m in love with you.” He said, like he was admitting a crime. “Madly. Completely. I can’t help it anymore. I’ve stopped trying to help it.”

The tears came before I could stop them. “You can’t say things like that,” I whispered.

“Why not?”

“Because you’re getting married in seven weeks. And I, in six.” I sniffed, “We can’t be having such conversations.”

“I know you feel what I feel. And…”

“No.” I stopped him, “I don’t feel anything, Oceans. I don’t.”

He smiled, and it might as well be the first time I’ve ever seen my boss smile.

“Then why are you shaking?” He held my gaze, “Why are you crying this much?” He narrowed his brows. “You feel the same way. You can’t even hide it.”

I shook my head, “No. I don’t. Don’t make it hard for us.”

He reached up and wiped the tear from my cheek with his thumb. “If I had my way, I would abandon that wedding tomorrow. I would marry you instead.”

I closed my eyes.

“I know you don’t love him, Kiss.” His hand cupped my face. “You’re with him out of obligation. Same as me with her. But that doesn’t change the fact that even after you’re married-“he paused, his thumb brushing my lower lip, “You’ll still be the woman I want.” He licked his lower lip, your cunt will still be the only one I fuck.”

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My breath caught.

The words were crude, but the way he said them, soft and almost reverent, made them feel sacred.

“I wouldn’t want to cheat on my husband. I said quietly.

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Chapter 110

He smiled. It was a sad smile. “Then I’ll make sure you don’t have one.”

“What does that mean?”

He moved closer slowly, on his knees, until he was close enough that I could feel the heat from him.

His hand reached slowly for the side of my face.

“It means I can do anything.” His eyes held mine. “Anything. Including making sure you aren’t married to Jace. Including keeping you as my mistress if that’s what it takes.” He let out a breath. “Because I can’t touch her, Kiss. I tried. I failed. And I’m tired of pretending I can learn to want someone who isn’t you.”

His words should have warned me. But, for all I knew, they were mere words.

I looked at him, and after everything, the only thing that came out of me was a small, tired smile.

“You are insane.”

His eyes softened. “I’ve been called worse. But only a few have actually seen me go insane.” He smiled, “And they never remained the same.”

He leaned down and kissed me.