Raven POV
Ah. Dammit.
I messed up.
I messed up badly.
Why the hell had I been so impulsive?
I had hidden it so well this past week, so why did I lose control at the very last moment?
I tightened my grip around the glass in my hand, the bottle of whiskey sitting beside me as I leaned back against the couch in my apartment.
I should’ve already been on my way back to the estate by now.
But the look on her face after I kissed her kept haunting me.
So I drank.
And drank again.
But it wasn’t helping.
That stunned expression kept replaying in my head over and over again. She hadn’t even said anything afterward, which somehow made it worse. It made me desperately wish I could go back in time and stop myself before I ruined everything.
But...
My hand slowly moved to my lips, and my breath caught as I imagined kissing her again.
Fuck.
I was pathetic.
Sitting here alone fantasizing about my brother’s mate like I had been doing for years.
I was five years older than her, the one who was supposed to be more mature and responsible, yet I still couldn’t stop myself.
At first, I convinced myself it was just pity.
I pitied her because everyone treated her like garbage.
Because she always looked so lonely and every time she smiled, it looked fragile, like it could disappear at any second.
But then every night when I closed my eyes, she was all I could think about.
Her voice.
Her laugh.
The way she tried so hard not to cry in front of people.
I really never expected myself to fall for a woman.
Was that why I turned down every man who asked me out over the years?
Because I was gay and somehow hopelessly in love with a woman who used to belong to my brother?
Would she even look my way after this?
To think she acted like she had already moved on, but every night I still heard her crying herself to sleep through the walls.
That bastard had completely broken her.
My chest tightened painfully at the thought.
Suddenly, my phone buzzed beside me, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I glanced at the screen and immediately snarled when I saw Jaxen’s name.
Part of me wanted to answer just so I could scream at him and tell him what a fucking idiot he had been.
But the other part, the guilty part, knew I had no right to judge him anymore.
I had just kissed his mate.
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