Perfect Bastard (by Mary D. Sant) novel Chapter 34

Chapter 34: The No–Secrets Table

ELLIE

I ran out of the restaurant, leaving Will and Ethan behind. Luckily for me, Todd was no longer waiting.

Leaving him waiting had been a real asshole move on my part. And the fact that I’d made him wait just so I could fuck Ethan in the bathroom made me feel

even worse.

Damn it, Ellie. Have you lost your mind? It was supposed to be just once. Having sex with him in a restaurant bathroom was not part of the plan.

I wanted to regret it. I really did. But, hell, it had been so good. One of the most exciting experiences of my life.

It was too late for regrets. Morgan might make me lose my mind, but the fact that I wanted it just as much didn’t help.

Doing it again only made things more complicated between us. I could handle spending a single night with him, but letting it happen again was a mistake- and it left room for the thought that maybe he was interested.

Especially since he kept asking about Todd, demanding to know if I would go back to him.

Did he care? That made no sense at all. But the way he had seemed pissed after seeing me with Todd–that was not the reaction of someone who didn’t

care.

Why the hell was I even thinking about this? It didn’t matter if he cared about me or not. He had made it clear he was only interested in sex.

All of this had been a mistake–one that couldn’t happen again. I needed to stay away from Ethan. I couldn’t let him think I’d be his little sex toy.

Shit. Now Will knows. Which means Anna will find out soon, too.

It would be easier to forget all of this if I didn’t have to explain it to her, but now I would.

I considered texting her. Maybe if I told her before Will did, she wouldn’t kill me. But what was I supposed to say?

I started typing while walking down the sidewalk on my way home.

Good morning! Sorry for not telling you before, but I fucked that asshole Morgan.

No. That didn’t sound good.

Maybe just…

I slept with Ethan, and Will caught us…

No. How about…

I’ll tell you everything! Don’t believe anything Will says.

That sounded good. I hit send.

When I got home, Todd was nowhere to be found. I wanted to apologize in person, but he had probably already left for work.

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Chapter 34: The No–Secrets Table

So, I sent him a message apologizing and making up an excuse about not feeling well. I prayed he hadn’t seen Ethan at the restaurant.

Anna arrived earlier than usual. She had already sent me dozens of messages. Some were threats, and the others were like: “I can’t believe you fucked him!” “My God! You fucked him in the bathroom?!”

“I should kill you!” she said, stopping in front of my desk. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“So, all I have to do is sleep with someone for you to show up ten minutes early?” I teased.

“Who said you get to make jokes? I’m actually mad at you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I thought you told me everything.” She sat in the chair across from my desk, tucking a strand of dark hair behind her ear.

“Well, I was going to tell you. I just hadn’t decided when yet. But now I know Will can’t keep a secret.”

“He’s pissed at Ethan and worried about you.”

“I’m sorry. He wasn’t supposed to see us.”

“So you could keep hiding it from us?” She raised an eyebrow.

“No! This was a mistake, Anna. It was supposed to be just once.”

“Right. You have ten minutes to tell me everything, with all the details.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Will said you went to Ethan’s apartment. Is that true?”

How did Will know that? Ethan didn’t want anyone to know about us. Maybe Will had pressured him into talking.

“Yes.”

“I thought you said you’d find someone who’s less of a bastard.”

“I thought you said it could be just sex.”

“Yeah, I did. I’m not judging you. I just want to know why you changed your mind.”

“He… makes me feel things no one else has in a long time,” I admitted after thinking for a moment.

It was hard to say that out loud.

“Wow…” she said, surprised, raising her eyebrows before knitting them together in uncertainty. “Is that… a good thing?”

“No. It’s not. Because that’s exactly why I lost my mind and fucked him again this morning. In that bathroom.”

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Chapter 34: The No–Secrets Table

“Wait… Let’s go back to the beginning. You slept with him at his apartment after you went there, Why did you go? Did he tell you to?”

“Yes. He was here Monday morning.”

“And he convinced you to see him?”

“I wanted to, so I went.”

“Just like that?” A playful smile appeared on her lips.

“Just like that. What do you want me to say?”

“Nothing, it’s just… that doesn’t sound like you.”

“You’re making me sound boring.”

“That’s not it. It’s just that you’ve been saying for a while now that you don’t want to sleep with someone just for sex.” She shrugged.

“I know. You must be sick of hearing me say that.”

“And was it good? I mean… it must have been, since you said he makes you feel all these things, and you had sex in a bathroom today.” She pressed her lips together, trying to hold back a smile.

“Good doesn’t even come close,” I admitted, letting out a deep sigh.

“Shit. Don’t tell me Morgan has you falling for him.” She sounded genuinely worried.

“I could lie and say it was awful. But the truth is, it was the best sex I’ve ever had.”

“Oh, Ellie… Why do I feel like that’s a bad thing?”

“Because it is. It’s not like I can enjoy it. This can never happen again.”

“Why not?”

“You know why. He’s only interested in sex. And I’m not made for that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’ve gotten over a broken heart before–I can get over a good fuck, right?”

“The best of your life?”

“As my best friend, shouldn’t you say: Yes, Ellie, you’ll be fine?”

“Of course you will.”

“Thank you,” I said sarcastically.

“We’ll finish this conversation at lunch, and then you’re telling me every filthy detail,” she said before getting up and walking around the desk to kiss my

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Chapter 34: The No–Secrets Table

cheek

“You know that won’t help me forget, right?”

“Good! That’s your punishment for not telling me sooner.” She smirked before heading toward the exit.

Anna really did make me tell her every filthy detail over lunch, I also took the opportunity to tell her what had happened with Todd.

She nearly lost it when I told her I let him sleep on my couch. And even after I explained that I was just trying to forgive him so we could move on, she kept telling me to stay away from him.

I think she was worried he might convince me to give him a second chance. To me,

that seemed unlikely.

She also reminded me that our vacation was coming up soon. I hadn’t realized it was so close–just over a week away.

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