The Professor's Mate Clause novel Chapter 87

Chapter 87

FREYA’S POV

Day one without Adrian.

I wake up in Clara’s apartment. Alone. Cold. The bond between us aching. Pulling. Demanding I go back to him. Demanding I fix this. Demanding I stop this separation that’s killing us both.

But I can’t. Not yet. Not when I still see his fangs. Still feel his body pinning me. Still remember the terror of thinking he was going to take my choice away.

Clara makes breakfast. I don’t eat. Just push food around my plate. Trying to process. Trying to understand how we got here. How love became fear. How protection became control.

“Has anyone heard from him?” I finally ask.

“No. He’s gone. Disappeared into the woods right after… after it happened.” Clara sits across from me. “Marcus is worried. Says he’s never seen Adrian like this. So out of control. So broken.”

“Good.”

“He should be broken. Should feel what he almost did. Should…” I can’t finish. Can’t say I want him to suffer when part of me just wants him back. Wants his arms around me. Wants everything to be okay again.

“You’re allowed to be angry and miss him at the same time. They’re not mutually exclusive.” Clara touches my hand. “Feelings are complicated. Especially with mates.

“I don’t know if I can forgive this. If I can look at him the same way. If I can trust him not to lose control again.” Tears slip down my cheeks. “I love him Clara. But I’m scared of him. Of what he almost did. Of what he might do next time.”

“Then take your time. Figure out what you need. What boundaries you have to set. What has to change before you can even consider reconciliation.” She squeezes my hand. “And if you decide you can’t go back. If you decide the trust is too broken. The pack will support you. I’ll support you. You’re not trapped.”

“Except I am. By the bond. By my wolf who’s howling for her mate. By the war that’s coming. By everything we’ve built together. “I wipe my face. “I can’t leave him. Can’t walk away. But I don’t know how to stay either. How to be with someone who terrifies me as much as I love them.”

We sit in silence. No answers. No solutions. Just the weight of an impossible situation and a broken heart.

**

***

Day two without Adrian.

The pack is talking. Whispering. Speculating about what happened. About why their Alpha disappeared.

I ignore them. Focus on training. On preparing for war. On anything that isn’t thinking about him. About us. About what we’ve lost.

Marcus pulls me aside after training. “We need to talk.”

“If this is about Adrian…”!

“It’s about the pack. About leadership. About the fact that our Alpha has been gone for two days and no one knows where he is or when he’s coming back.” Marcus looks exhausted. Stressed. “I’m doing my best to hold things together. But people are stared Freya. War is coming and their Alpha is missing. That’s not good for morale.”

“What do you want me to do about it?”

“Go find him. Bring him back. Whatever happened between you. Whatever broke The pack needs him. Needs both of you United. Strong. Ready to lead them into battle.”

“I can’t. I’m not ready. I’m still

“I don’t care if you’re ready.” His voice gets hard. “I don’t care if you’re hurt or angry or scared. The pack comes first. Always. That’s what being Luna means. What being Alpha Female means. You put your personal shit aside and do what’s necessary for the pack.” 1

The words sting because they’re true. Because I’ve been so focused on my pain. My fear. My broken trust. That I forgot about everyone else. Everyone depending on us. Everyone who needs us to be strong even when we’re falling apart.

“I don’t know where he is.”

“Follow the bond. It’ll lead you to him. It always does.” Marcus softens slightly. “Look. I’ra sorry for being harsh. But the pack is on edge. The deadline with Asher is approaching. We need our Alphas. Both of them. Together. Can you do that? Can you put the pack first just long enough to bring him home?”

I want to say no. Want to stay hidden in Clara’s apartment where I feel safe. Where I don’t have to face him.

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