On the Edge (The Grange Complex Book 1) novel Chapter 22

Dexter

Harry had his arms around Sasha. What the fuck was going on? A shot of raging jealousy singed my chest, but I tried to ignore it. I hadn’t seen her since she got that fucking phone call. Fuck, even now she looked sexy as hell, wearing skimpy black shorts that exposed these well-defined thighs.

I was frustrated sexually and mentally. In the past few days I had been trying to figure out why I got so pissed off the other day. I’d always known that she was going to move out, but we weren’t done playing yet.

“Hey, Dex, how are you?” Harry asked.

“Fine.”

That’s all I said, then I opened the door into my apartment and slid inside. I couldn’t be bothered talking to him, not right in front of her. We were close and we had stuff in common, but the situation with Victoria hadn’t really sunk in yet and I had a lot to think about. I kept insisting to myself that me and Sasha, we were done—this whole thing had gone too far—but I still wanted to have her in my bed. I regretted that I had thrown her out of my apartment right after telling her that I didn’t care.

In the past twenty-four hours, I had been fighting with myself, wondering if I should just go to her and apologise. Fuck, Dexter Tyndall didn’t show any signs of weakness.

Several minutes later there was a knock to my door. I wondered who it was this time.

“Hiding in our bunker, are we?” Harry asked, standing at the door. I should have known that he would show up here, but why did he go see Sasha? He had no business with her.

“Not in the fucking mood. What do you want?” I asked and started walking away. I heard him closing the door behind us.

“What’s with you and Barbie?”

I ignored him and picked up some Jack Daniels from the cupboard. My head was racing again, and I hadn’t fucked anyone else since Sasha. This was getting out of control.

“Nothing. We fucked, fought, made up, fucked some more. It was fun,” I said, laughing it out, but I sounded like a total asshole. My body was craving her for more than just sex.

Harry didn’t look happy with me and yes, I got it. I hated myself right then. I’d fucked up. And then there was Victoria and her emotional blackmail. I had no idea what to do.

“All right, so if you’re done with her then can I have a go?”

I lost my shit then. I got up so quickly that the chair fell back onto the floor, and I grabbed Harry by the collar. I was ready to beat the shit out of him, but Harry was taller than me, and he reacted faster than I expected. He wrestled with me for a bit and then slapped me like I was a girl.

“For fuck’s sake! Calm the fuck down, Dexter. I’m your friend. Do you really think that I would tap that while you can’t even get it together enough to admit that you want to keep her for yourself?” he shouted and let go of my shirt.

I didn’t say anything. He was partly right; I went into a rage even thinking about her and another guy. But then she had just made a decision and fucking accepted that offer.

“It’s complicated,” I muttered.

“Funny, because when I asked her about you, she said the same thing,” Harry replied. He seemed angry and my own head was wrecked. I didn’t know what I wanted anymore. “She said that you aren’t the boyfriend type, so she isn’t holding much hope.”

Barbie was right. What did Harry want from me anyway? To go to her and declare my love? That wasn’t happening—this wasn’t a fucking Mills and bastard Boon book.

“She’s right and there won’t be any happily-ever-after. I like her, but that’s about it. I don’t work well in a relationship.”

Harry sighed and sat on the sofa. I was hoping that he would leave, but he stayed and began asking me about the business and the complex. I was sensing that he wanted to know what went on between Sasha and me, but I wasn’t ready to talk about what was really niggling at me. This whole thing was complicated enough between us.

An hour later he was gone and the buzzing in my ears started, so I took a bath. A few hours later, I was still hearing the buzzing noises and I couldn’t pinpoint them, so I stayed busy rearranging the paperwork in my office, looking through properties and my finances. That didn’t help, and I started going through my apartment, trying to find the insects that must have been making that noise that I had been hearing all day. My pulse was speeding up and I couldn’t sit in one place, so I put running shoes on and went out. A few miles would do the job. The imaginary voices should eventually go away. 

I passed through the entrance to the complex and ran through the grounds. The gate to the beach was unlocked. I kept looking behind me, feeling like someone was following me, but each time I stopped there was no one there. 

I ran for miles, longer than I should have, stopping from time to time and glancing behind me. My breath was coming in short ragged pants; I was pushing myself hard with no real purpose. At some point I turned around and then walked back. The buzzing noises followed.

This time the physicality of hard exercise didn’t seem to be doing me any good. Sex and women were the best solution to all my problems, but I didn’t want just any pussy; I needed Sasha’s.

I wasn’t so much anxious as agitated and tired. There were still many hours of the day left. The thought of coming back to the empty apartment plunged me into consuming despair, but this was what I had always wanted. Pap died because he couldn’t handle life. I’d rather stay alone than be dead.                                                  

“Dexter?” 

I lifted my head and stopped, seeing Sasha in her tight running shorts and sports vest. She was walking towards me from the other side of the beach. Now I had no choice; I had to come up with some sort of apology, because I wanted to get lost with her, shade the windows in my bedroom and bury my cock in her slick wetness. “What are you doing here?”

It was a lame question, but I didn’t know how to act around her anymore. She made me uneasy. I was normally very confident and aggressive, even with clients. I knew what I needed from them, but being with woman I cared about—that was an entirely different thing.

“Right now, nothing. I’m going home,” she replied and walked past me. Okay, so she was still pissed and she didn’t want to talk to me. That was understandable after the way I had treated her.

“Barbie, wait. I need you to hear me out, so stop running,” I barked.

She glared at me. “I’m not running away Dexter, I’m going home.”

“Listen, I’m fucking sorry, all right? I shouldn’t have thrown you out of my apartment,” I said, massaging the nape of my neck.

She sighed and shook her head, then walked up to me. Why couldn’t I just say that I wasn’t ready for her to leave, that I liked having her around? Stupid fuck!

“Just don’t say something that you don’t mean, Dexter.”