Second Assault — Bond And Treason — novel Chapter 18

ALEXEI

—Angelo — I have to fight to be able to pronounce the words through the thick knot that has been created in my throat —. For God's sake, tell me it's not true... — he lowers the gaze and begins to twist his fingers nervously on the lap.

Yaakov rests the elbows on his knees and drops his head between the hands.

—Shit... — I hear him whispering. I jump up and walk in long strides across the room.

I have trouble breathing, my body feels stiff and tense, sweat drops begin to slide down my forehead and my pulse beats rapidly in my neck.

I remove the coat from my suit, my tie and throw it somewhere, too immersed in my turbulent thoughts to care.

I release three buttons from my shirt and try to make the air fill my lungs

—Magnus, stop — My cousin's voice causes just a distant sound echo in my head. I can't see anything, I can't hear anything. I feel only anger. Red, thick, toxic, rotten anger. Images of Xander being hurt, tortured, outraged and humiliated mock my sanity with disturbing constancy.

My claws begin to extend at the ends of my fingers, the hair on the back of my neck gets longer and so do my fangs. My breath is shaking incredibly fast and my lucidity seems to leave me with the same speed.

—That's enough! — Yaakov puts the hands on my shoulders and squeezes hard, shaking me. That's when I notice the smell of blood... I'm bleeding —. Stop it! — My claws have pierced my palms, making red drops fall on the clean wooden floor, and I don't know at what moment I have torn the fabric of my shirt, causing long, thin scratches to pierce the skin of my torso.

—Yaakov, I need... — the words come out practically in grunts, my wolf tearing me apart inside, trying to take over —. I need to... Run — He stares at me and I notice the understanding gaining clarity in his features. He nods slowly and the grip loosens, though he still doesn't release me.

—It's okay. Just make sure you don't spend the night out — he leans closer to whisper —. Remember, Xander still needs you.

Nodding, unable to formulate the words, blinking quickly to chase away the persistent tears that threaten to come out. Yaakov holds me by one arm and guides me to the exit. I don't know if Angelo is following us and honestly, I'm not interested at this moment.

What I need now is to give some relief to the weight that has just settled on my shoulders. By the time we get out, the sun is already setting on the horizon and the sounds of cicadas and birds flying around the property are present.

I take a deep breath, trying to retain the change a little longer.

—On the way here I could see a small creek over there — points out the direction I should take —. You can wander around there peacefully, but don't do anything crazy, Magnus. Do you understand me? — I nod again, biting my lips so hard that the metallic taste invades my taste buds —. Give some relief to your wolf and when you return, I'll make sure I have new clothes and food for you and Xander.

He pats me on the back and I start walking, towards a pile of trees on the side of the house, into the forest surrounding the property.

When I make sure I am out of sight, I strip off the remaining items of clothing, my shoes, and release myself. The change subdues my human side, leaving the domain to my animal one. Suddenly, I no longer have feet or hands, but paws. My ears are now long and pointed, my snout extended with a keen sense of smell and a thick, hairy tail.

The sensations overwhelm me for a few seconds, until I start running. I run and run until I reach the small creek that Yaakov mentioned. The water is crystal clear and surrounded by lush grass in shades of green, brown, and yellow.

I approach it and allow my legs to get wet with its warmth. Sadness takes hold quickly and without limit in the solitude that surrounds me. I suffer for Xander, I grieve for his cruelly stolen virtue and I sorrow that I was stupid enough to let something like this happen.

I tilt my head back, filling my chest with air, and through a howl, I cry. I cry to Mother Moon. The strength and the intensity make me feel as if my throat is tearing, my claws are dipping into the ground under me and I ask for resistance, which seems to have abandoned me.

My wolf feels helpless and defeated, having failed miserably to protect his Omega and I share his pain with growing disappointment.

By the time I return, still in my animal form, Yaakov is waiting for me, sitting on a chair at the entrance to the house, a pair of clothes resting on one thigh, and a cigarette is held between his fingers, leaving a small cloud of smoke dissipating into the air.

Lights shine through the windows. I stop for a moment, gathering the courage I feel lacking, until Yaakov looks up and notices my presence. He extinguishes the cigarette with the sole of the shoe, stands up and approaches me, holding the clothes.

—Better? — he asks once he manages to stand inches away. I invoke my human side and feel the changes take over my body once again. Until I am finally on my feet again, as God brought me into the world.

—Yes — I answered once I can speak, when in reality I want to cry out and learn how to appease the burning pain in my heart —. Let's say yes.

—Here — passing me the clothes, a white wool sweater, some worn-out black jeans and a pair of shoes —. Cover yourself up and join us for dinner — I slide the clothes over my skin until my figure is properly covered. Yaakov nods for me to follow him.

Inside the house, a smell of freshly baked cake and wine invades my nostrils. In the dining room, Angelo sits with a laptop on the table, wiggling the fingers skillfully on the keyboard. Yaakov passes by me and sits down next to him. In the kitchen is Rosé with big oven mitts reaching down to her elbows, pulling a tray with a golden cake out of the oven. Xander is beside her, stacking a couple of plates and placing several pieces of cutlery on top.

I lean against the wall, resting my weight on one of my shoulders, unable to avoid watching him. He's wearing a long scarlet red nightie that almost hides his little hands, with black pants just like mine, with gaps that expose the skin on his knees. He is barefoot and I know perfectly well that it is on his initiative.

And his face is inexpressive... I don't know if it's because he's concentrated on the task at hand, or because he hides something more intense behind those beautiful blue eyes. My heart is pounding in my chest as I watch him more and more, the feeling of failure take over. He turns on his feet and walks towards the dining room holding the dishes. After leaving them on the table, he realizes that I am there and his gaze connects to mine.

He smiles... And it is the most sincere and radiant smile I have seen on his beautiful face since this morning and one of the many I have missed from him since he was taken from me. Quickly runs in my direction and surrounds my neck with the arms, I with mine encircle his waist and lift him slightly off the ground. He is thinner, his limbs have lost volume too. I take one hand to his head and bury my fingers through the strands of his hair.