Sentenced to Marriage by MadlainQ novel Chapter 78

Emotionless

I couldn’t cry even though I wanted to. For some sick reason, my body decided that it would be better if I kept all my intense emotions rotting inside me instead of crving them out. I lay on my bed, thinking about how this could happen. I was so engaged in his war that I poured my heart and soul into it, but he decided to crush it. Even if it was a twisted way of his to protect me, it destroyed everything and all the trust between us. I was certain of him, to the point where I wanted to risk my life for him because I thought that he would do the same… Was I only fooling myself?

I stared at the ceiling, analyzing the situation of my kidnapping with a brand-new filter. What would have happened if I hadn’t found my way out of there? Would Aren have risked his life to save mine, or perhaps it was merely my foolish assumption? Maybe he had never planned to enter that building in the first place. Maybe his sole purpose had always been to catch the one who wanted him dead? I felt that my heart grew bitter with every new “maybe” that appeared inside my mind.

“Idiot…” I muttered to myself, letting out a humorless laugh. “You wanted to believe in a fairy

tale, but such doesn’t exist.”

I struggled with shallow breathing for another hour until suddenly, my chest stopped hurting, as if someone put out the fire consuming my heart. Now it became almost cold, easily letting go of all the necessary emotions.

“23 and a half more months, Cora,” I mumbled. “At least you didn’t sell yourself cheap.”

It looked like all women from the Bell family were cursed, and I wasn’t an exception. Perhaps God didn’t want us to be loved by men, but he certainly wanted us to be strong, and I needed to toughen up. I should have learned to value my heart long ago, and yet I kept repeating my mistakes. Aren was right about one thing: I needed to suck it up.

After contemplating for another five hours while staring at the ceiling, I got up from my bed with my heart carefully patched and a new plan for the rest of my life that didn’t involve Aren in it.

For the first time, I got out of bed before Aren. I could still hear him snoring when I passed his bedroom on my way downstairs to the kitchen. I preferred it that way. I made us coffee, some toast, and vegetable salad as if nothing had changed… Well, superficially it didn’t, but it felt completely different. I sat down and ate my portion of the salad, carefully calculating everything that needed to be done. I became completely task-oriented. By the time I was finishing my cup of coffee, Aren came down.

“Good morning,” he said in a slightly sleepy voice, the one that used to make my heart flutter only yesterday

“Good morning,” I replied dryly. “Your coffee is getting cold. I also made two copies of the recording and hid it on two well-protected virtual drives, just in case. Now I’ll go upstairs to finish getting ready to leave.” After my announcement, I got up and started walking upstairs.

“Cora” I heard his warm voice, and all my defense walls fell down. I glanced over my shoulder, struggling to keep my face indifferent, just like I did a few seconds ago. He gave me

brief smile “I’m glad we’ve come to terms.”

If he wanted to rub salt on my wounds, he did a tremendous job. I swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. “Yes, we did,” I replied, turning away from him. If I had any doubts that the road of indifference was my best and only choice, then they all disappeared at that very moment, “Come to terms, my ass,” I muttered under my breath while climbing the stairs, I wanted to scream and hit him hard, but would it change anything? I needed to swallow the pill no matter how agonizingly bitter it was. Of course, that didn’t change the fact that I had already planned to mess up his life in every possible way a hacker could as soon as our contractual marriage ended.

I barely said a word to him while we were on our way to the FBL Despite telling myself that! should act naturally and contain my emotions, I felt it wasn’t working at all. I was all emotions – I only changed their type, from fluffy and mushy to stinging and razor-sharp. I tried to hide them underneath a carefully crafted smile, but I couldn’t erase them from my eyes,