The Biker’s Mafia Princess (Angel and Savage) novel Chapter 2

Rebel POV.

I sit back down as I look at the two of them. There was a time that I truly loved them. Maybe somewhere deep inside I still do, but that’s locked away tight. Looking at them both, they have aged so much over the years. They look tired, heartbroken, racked with guilt. I sigh, not liking this one bit.

“The club will, of course, give nanna and pop-pop the best send off they deserve. I will do everything in my power to get them justice. Alonso Ricci and Paddy Smyth will die screaming. I can promise you both that now. I’m sorry that this happened to them.” I take a breath as I look away and sniffle to hold it together, but that control is slipping.

“Rebel, lil princess. We are so sorry for what happened to you growing up. We are to blame for all of this.” I look up as the first tear falls, not because of his words, but because it’s too much.

“It’s done. You both did what you did. You just left me. Let others raise me, yes I know I wasn’t the easiest and I think you can understand why. Nanna and pop-pop raised me with the help of Scar and Blaze and Coral. You two just, why is this so hard?” I say. I wipe my cheeks as I look at them both. They both have tears streaming down their faces.

“Tell me this though, I think you owe me that much. Why? Why did you just give up and forget about me? Was I not good enough? Was I not what you both wanted?” Fuck, I break down as I sob into my hands. I knew coming back here would open up all those old scars.

“Oh baby girl, no. It wasn’t your fault. We loved and still love you very much. It was just hard. We had two babies under the age of two. You were always so independent. Days turned to weeks, then months, then years. By the time we figured it out, it was too late. You already hated us and were doing everything in your power to make sure we knew how much we fucked up.” I didn’t realise I was hugging her just as hard as she was with me.

“Then you shouldn’t have had more kids. I’m sorry, Mom. That is harsh, but it’s the truth. You let me slip away. You left me to be raised by others. You forgot about me. I tried, you know, I tried to be good, to make you proud that in my head if I was good you would finally look up and see me, like you both used to.” I wipe my face and move back from her. She is watching me and so is my dad. He has his hand on my arm.

“I got so fucking angry with you both, with the kids that stole all your attention, that the only way I could get any attention from either of you was to be bad. Being good got me nothing, but being bad got you both looking at me. It’s fucked up, I’m fucked up, and that is on both of you.” Truth hurts, but I have to take some responsibility in this and I will do.

“I could have tried when I came back from rehab. But I didn’t. What was the point? You choose your two golden kids. I was the pain in the ass, the burden, the rebel. But I was a little girl, I was your little girl. All I wanted was your time, your love, your acknowledgement. But I got nothing, I got blamed, I got pushed away, and that is on you all.” I say as I look at them, hiccupping through the sobs as I let it all out. I have held onto this for so fucking long. It has made me bitter and hateful.

“Oh baby, I’m so fucking sorry. We are both so fucking sorry. We want to fix this. I know you think it’s too late to do that, but I know it’s not. Rebel, we have watched you from a far. Every time you kill someone, I have seen it. I have seen that innocent part of you die more and more. Don’t kill her completely. Let us in. We love you Rebel and we are so proud of you. As much as it hurts us, you did this on your own. I know it won’t mean shit to you because of what we did. We do love you. We think about you every fucking day. Talk about you all the time.” I look at him. His blue eyes are red and puffy from the crying he is doing.

Can I ever forgive them? Can we move forward as a family?

“Actions speak louder than words, dad. I don’t know if it’s too late. Or if one of them two sees their asses, then I’m left again. They have been both your priorities for so long, I was not even a thought. Not until I fucked up massively, that is. Have either of you put yourself in my shoes? No, so I suggest you do, then tell me what you would do in my situation.” I say to him and he hangs his head in shame, the same as my mom just sobs, clutching at her breaking heart.

I cough and look away and wipe my eyes, taking a few deep breaths to calm my emotions. I look back and see them both looking at me.

“You’re right. We don’t deserve anything from you, not after what we did. But I’m going to be a cunt, Rebel, I am still your mom, he is still your dad. Give us a chance to prove to you that we want you. We want you, baby girl. We always have and always will. Can you do that? Can you give us and the family a chance?” Can I do that? Can I just let it all go? Be vulnerable with them? Show them that the young Rebel is still there wanting their love and attention?

I don’t know, but I won’t know if I don’t try. It is more than either of them deserves. I bite my bottom lip and look into her honey coloured eyes that are like mine and she slowly nods her head like she knows I will. I look at my dad and he is looking at me with fear, fear that I will tell them to go and fuck off.

“I will give you both a chance to redeem yourselves. But make no mistake you have until the threat is dealt with. One fuck up from either of you, then it’s done. You leave me alone and you forget you ever had me.” I say to them, have I just made a mistake? Have I done the right thing? Why is this so fucking complicated?

Arms engulf me and I’m squashed between the two of them. I cry as I clutch them both. We all stay like this for a while. Mom kisses my cheek like she used to.