The Billionaire's Past novel Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

On the other hand its 3:00 am Asia

Aliyah is sitting inside a company shuttle service. While on the ride she decided to read the messages on her cellphone that she missed to reply because she is busy at work yesterday.

The shuttle service is heading to the company now.

For its two hours ride Aliyah have still time to reply all the messages she have on her phone.

Almost all the messages is came from her family, some of her friends and from Atif.

She was finished replying all the messages came from her family and friends when she decided to delete the message of Atif for she is not interested to send any message to him.

But when she long pressed the message of Atif to delete all the conversation, the messenger app hang and when it respond again Atif message chat head open INSTEAD of being deleted.

Simultaneously the messenger apps receive a message so another chat head open.

Then there are three message chat head open.

The messages are came from Aliyah’s friends in her hometown.

They just saying “Hello” that’s why Aliyah in returned just type “Hi, how are you?” and she is about to send it to one of her friend but she didn’t notice that instead of typing it to her friend message chat head, she accidentally press the message chat head of Atif AND the message was about to send to Atif.

But just a matter of seconds Aliyah noticed it and tried to cancel it as fast as she could but it’s too late.

The message sent to Atif.

Aliyah tried to unsent the message but unfortunately the messenger app hang again and when it function she already got an answer from Atif.

“Hello, I’m fine. How about you? ” Atif replied.

“I’m fine. But honestly that message is not for you. I just wrong sent. I’m sorry if I disturbed you.” Aliyah replied.

Aliyah just replied because of guilt feeling.

Why she feel guilty? Because Atif made an effort to reply to her message thinking that the message is for himself without knowing that she is just wrong send.

Another reason why she replied is she think that if she reply that way, Atif will stop replying and that’s what Aliyah wants.

Aliyah wants to stop sending message to Atif and she also wants Atif stop sending message to her.

But why?

What is the reason behind?

Because Aliyah don’t want to have an emotional attachment to anyone else.

She is an intimacy phobic person.

Intimacy phobias are after one thing, and that is to avoid being hurt.

She don’t want to get hurt.

Intimacy avoidance describes the degree to which an individual withdraws from close emotional contact.

Aliyah fear that she will get close to Atif if they continue sending message to each other.

They are starting sharing thoughts so Aliyah is afraid that it will lead into friendship.

Aliyah’s thinking is advance even though it’s not happening or will not happen or maybe will happen.

She’s thinking of this scenario, “What if they become friends and that friendship ends.”

Why Aliyah have all these worries and fear?

As mention she has a psychological disorder or personality disorder.

BUT that thing is unknown to her.

Aliyah didn’t know that she had that condition.

She will not determine it unless it will diagnose.

Her emotion is splitting again.

Splitting is an unconscious attempt to safeguard ego and prevent anxiety. A defense mechanism commonly developed by people who have experience early life traumas, such as abandonment.

In essence, she is often terrified that others will leave her.

She have an intense fear of abandonment.

However, she can also shift suddenly to feeling smothered and fearful of intimacy, which leads her to withdraw from getting close to others.

The result is a constant back-and-forth between demands for attention and sudden withdrawal or isolation.

Aliyah didn’t expect that she will get another reply from Atif.

“It’s okay! No worries? So what are you doing right now?” Atif said.

“I’m taking care of my kids”, Aliyah lie to Atif.