The Dark Side Of Fate by Karima Sa'ad Usman novel Chapter 217

~Susan~

Love could be messed up sometimes, and in my case, most of the time. That was my story when Maurice Volkov threatened my life, and my uncle had to move me to the south. I did not hear anything that day, but the paranoid man believed I did, and for that, I was asked to leave the north or die.

Writing the letter to Sylvester was hard, and I shed many tears. Tears that had never stopped falling ever since.

I knew he would be heartbroken, but my heart was bound to break more because I knew the truth. While he would hate me, I would have no one but myself to hate for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. That was twelve years ago now, and my heart was still aching.

I never moved on from Sylvester. I couldn't. I used to dream that we would return to the north one day, and I would see him. I will tell him the truth, and he will forgive me. Unfortunately for me, things did not turn out the way that I wanted. It hurt.

I was happy for Sylvester.

Tamia was a perfect fit for him and his personality, but where did that leave me? I was stuck in limbo. I could not move forward, and neither could I move backwards.

Devin brought light and life into my life, and I had fucked it up. I was afraid that fate would fuck us up, and he had argued otherwise, citing Marcel and Theodore's love life as an example, but what if we were the exception?

Devin thought I still wanted Sylvester, but that wasn't true.

He just reminded me of what I could have had. I also did not miss that he was now fated to Tamia. The moon had blessed them abundantly.

I sat in my new room and wept bitterly.

I should have said yes when Devin asked me to marry him. I should have thrown caution to the wind and said yes but instead; I said I would think about it.

I did not mean to hurt him with my words, but I had seen marriages crushed by fate. However rare the fated bond was, it somehow managed to fuck something up if it came. I was worried that we might get into it and something like that would happen to us.

I needed to be brazen and sure.

I needed to be determined for it to work out, so I said I would think about it. It wasn't because of Sylvester. It was to prepare for the unknown.

One thing Devin was yet to understand about me is that I suffered from depression. It was a well-kept secret, but it ran in my family. Hence our erratic behaviour. I tried to keep it under control by distancing myself from people and doing things that made me happy, but it was there.

My secrets and reluctance to open up had cost me dearly.

I loved Devin so much. My wolf Cleo and I could not give him up. I had done everything. I had learned to cook and throw out all my baggage just so it would work.

I was determined, but it crushed my soul when he said he would place me in the friend zone.

He was all the family I had now. My uncle and cousin had paid for their crimes with their lives; I was still healing.

No matter how evil they were, they were my family, and we loved each other.

I missed Glenda so much, and I was always afraid about talking about them with Devin because I knew he hated them. I had to heal alone.

How would I heal when I dared not speak of them? I had a lot bottled up, and it had compounded our issues.

"We have lost him, Sue," I told my wolf, Cleo.

I could not even go back to the kitchen to complete my meal.

The girl who had come to see him seemed into him, and nothing stopped him from getting involved with her.

She looked happy and less of a burden.

I did not know what to do.

I did not want to leave, but I did not want to be a burden. I did not want to force myself on him.

"We can't just give up on Devin like that. He is ours," Cleo said, and I laughed at myself.

"I do not know what to do. He does not want us. He let us leave his room last night, and this morning, when I mistakenly brought up his proposal, he wanted to leave. He is done with us," I told my wolf, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Maybe we should just leave," I told my wolf, and she growled.

"Don't you dare? We always leave. We have never tried to fight for anything. We always let people boss us around, lie to us, manipulate us and hinder us from achieving our true potential. So what Devin is mad, we will just have to prove to him that we love him and this is meant to be. We have to stick around for that," my wolf said, and I felt depression sinking in.

"I can't handle seeing him with another woman. I could let go of Sylvester and wish him well, but I couldn't do the same with Devin. We should leave," I said, and my wolf was silent because she understood what I meant.

"We caused this, Sue. We have to deal with it instead of running away as usual," Cleo said, and I shook my head.

"Get up and go out there. Plaster a smile and act like she doesn't get to you. That girl called us Miss Sullivan for a purpose. We have to make her shove it, Sue. Do not back down." Cleo said, and I reluctantly got up and went to the bathroom in my room.

I washed my face to reduce the swelling around my eyes and stepped out of the room.

I headed to the living room, and there was no one there.

Thinking Alice had gone out with Devin, I decided to clean the kitchen.

I entered, and Alice trashed my food and cleaned the place. I was mad instantly.