~Susan~
I woke up early in the morning and decided I would get a glass of milk. I shouldn't have ingested that much alcohol now I was feeling sick.
I left my room and headed towards the kitchen when I found Devin on the couch, attending to the documents he had left there.
I didn't know whether to speak to him or just get the glass of milk and leave.
"Couldn't sleep?" he asked me, breaking the ice, and I nodded.
"Shouldn't have drank so much gin," I said, and he looked at me a bit worried.
"I am fine, I just wanted to sleep, and it helped, but I guess it was temporary," I said, and he nodded, then put down the file in his hand.
He got up and walked up to me.
I stood frozen on the spot.
I wanted to step back, but there was no need. He had done nothing to me.
Devin reached for my face and wiped something away from my cheek.
I was embarrassed because it meant I had drooled while sleeping.
"Hungry?' he asked me gently with a smile, and I stood frozen.
I couldn't handle the formality and the friendly treatment. He used to be mine.
"Alice left some.." he started, and I shook my head vehemently.
I felt rage rising in me just at the mention of her name.
I was passive until I got to think of the situation then I got angry.
What Alice did was fucked up, and letting her do that was cruel. I did not do anything to him; I just needed space to think things through and be sure.
"I don't want anything your girlfriend has touched, Devin. I get the message. Besides, I will be excusing you two and going back to my uncle's house in the south," I said, fighting my tears and anger and turning to leave when he held my hand.
He held it so tight that I couldn't walk away from him.
I did not want to look at him.
I had promised myself not to cry again, and I was trying to keep that promise, but remembering Alice walking out of his room broke me completely. I never moved on, but he did so quickly.
"What do you mean by girlfriend?" he asked gently, and I began to laugh because my tears had won the battle.
"She told me that I wasn't needed here and that you and the pack had moved on since I Left. She told me she had to step in. I see how well she stepped in, Devin. She did everything in the house and even went to take care of you in the room at night after I had returned to my room. I saw her exit your room smiling, Devin," I said and began to laugh at myself.
"I can't believe I didn't figure it out when you insisted you didn't want me back, and we should just be friends. You didn't let me sleep in your room, and the next day, you wanted to walk away when I brought up the proposal.
I should have figured it out, but I was hoping you would give me a chance.
You should have just told me you had moved on, Devin.
I wouldn't have bothered.
I would have gone home and tried to heal.
This is wicked of you.
I might have been unstable with you, but I never did this to you," I said, jerking her hands away from him.
"I never hurt you like this. You keep saying I am not over Sylvester, but I am.
I do not know why you cannot believe I am over him.
I am happy he has found love and wish my life could be like his, happy and fulfilled. That is all, Devin.
But you always have to think the worst.
You do not know half of what I have to deal with.
I am dying inside.
How do you think I will feel and cope?
I have no family or support system. I am alone. I would have been dead if it weren't for Sylvester's law. I can never discuss my pain with you because you were part of the panel that put the rest of my family down. You were not wrong, they were, but that does not erase the fact they were my family, and I loved them.
They loved me regardless of their evil.
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