The Gift chronicles novel Chapter 1

Book 1 Chapter 42

It felt like a piece of my heart had been ripped out of my chest. Not only was the pain emotional, but I could swear that I felt physical pain over losing Carter.

Cain put his hand on my shoulder as I continued to hold Carter's dead body and sob. He was dead because of me.

Cain didn't say anything, which I was grateful for. I wasn't sure I could stop myself from killing him if he said anything cliché or corny.

His men were silent as they took in the bloodbath in front of them. I didn't know why none of them could feel the same tearing pain in their chest like I felt. It felt like a gaping bullet wound. I struggled to catch my breath. Something was seriously wrong.

It... hurts.... so bad.... I gasped out to Cain.

I know, pup. It's part of being a Luna. Your bond with the pack members is stronger than it is when you're a Gamma. You feel pack deaths more painfully, Cain's voice in my mind was apologetic.

Don't you feel it? I asked Cain. He seemed saddened by Carter's death, but not as intensely pained.

I've been the Alpha for over a decade. You get used to the feeling... somewhat, Cain rubbed my shoulders soothingly. I couldn't believe how he was able to keep his calm during such a devastating time. The pressure on my chest felt like it was going to cave in at any moment. We should get you back inside. Clean you up. You'll get sick if you're in the snow too long.

My body felt numb to the cold of the snow, and Carter's blood on me was the last of my concerns. Rose... Lily... I cried.

I know, Ares. They will be taken care of. I will make sure of it, Cain promised me.

After a few more sobs, I somewhat collected myself. I placed a kiss on Carter's cold cheek, and set him gently on the ground. Cain offered to pick me up, but I shook my head.

Rage burned bright inside of me. The rogues had no idea what they just did. Because of them, a woman lost her mate. A baby lost their father.

I summoned an axe, and walked over to the rogue that killed Carter. The knife was still embedded in his forehead, and I was angry he didn't die a slow, painful death.

I lifted the axe high, and brought it down hard on his neck, severing it completely from his body. I did the same with his other limbs, until his body parts were scattered around in red snow.

I moved to another rogue's dead body, and summoned a knife. I sobbed as I stabbed his corpse over and over until his body was so mangled, his features were indiscernible.

I mutilated all of the other bodies with various weapons until the snow was coated in thick blood, and random body parts were strewn about.

Cain and his men didn't say anything, they just let me take my anger out on the bodies of the rogues. One of his men slightly gagged at either the gruesome sight or the smell of blood and decay.

One of his men carefully picked up Carter's body. Already, his skin was pale and devoid of any warmth. He didn't deserve to die. If anyone should have been killed, it should have been me. The guilt was eating my organs away like maggots on a corpse.

Cain picked me up and held me, and it felt like his arms holding me tightly was the only reason why I didn't crumble into pieces. I had never felt more weak and vulnerable.

Cain disregarded all of the blood that coated my body. Some of it was Carter's, some of it was blood spatter from the rogues. Mutilating their corpses only made me feel slightly better.

It hurts, I whimpered to Cain, who tightened his arms around me. I didn't deserve to be comforted.